


Keeping Home

by orphan_account



Series: Finding Home [2]
Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: AU, F/F, Lesbians, USWNT, krashlyn - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-17
Updated: 2018-09-11
Packaged: 2019-02-03 17:25:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 30,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12752835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: The sequel to 'Finding Home', Keeping Home is a continuation of Ali and Ashlyn's journey.Now that Ali has made it out of her house, can she continue to fight past her demons that kept her there in the first place? Ashlyn is back in Orlando, which means she back in the lion's den and having to deal with a past that isn't pretty. Can Krashlyn continue to navigate the minefields of their past and work to building a healthy future with each other? Or will they not be able to keep the sense of home they only recently found in each other?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this is the second story in the Finding Home series. So if you haven't read Finding Home, you really need to or this story will make no sense to you. You can try to read this one on its own, it does include a bit of backstory from Finding Home, but it's worth it to read the first one. 
> 
> Anyways, who missed me? I am working on finals for my semester and I realized that I should take a bit of time and give you the holiday gift of the first chapter of the Finding Home sequel. So much has been going on in my life that I haven't really had a chance to do any writing, I've been super stressed. On the upside, I found out I can graduate from college in spring 2018. The downside is I have to take 15+ units to do so. I also have been having to go to physical therapy for my broken ankle, and so that's not fun. I also got a job, so yay for work experience. 
> 
> I've really missed writing, and I will continue to write when I can. Like I am really passionate about this sequel but the updates may not be as frequent as Finding Home was. So hopefully you all stick with me. I hope you enjoy Keeping Home, don't forget to subscribe to the updates as well as leave kudos and comments. They make me wanna write more when I have lots of comments and kudos. Also feel free to hit up my other stories. 
> 
> I miss you all and love you all
> 
> \- Becks

Life was about taking risks, about betting the odds that there was something or somebody out there worth the risk. Life was supposed to be about the grand gestures, about giving your best effort and having it work in your favor. 

So far Ali's life was working like that. She had done her job, she had risked leaving the one place she felt safe to win back the love of her life. It seemed to be working in her favor so far if the kiss Ashlyn had planted on her during the celebration of the Orlando Pride's first home victory was anything to go by. Ashlyn had kissed her and for the first time since they had broken up, Ali felt like maybe life was paying her back in kind for all the shit she had to go through. 

Maybe she was overly cautious still, maybe her time in isolation had made her jaded but she felt uneasy still. She felt like old wounds had been ripped open, exposed and raw for the world to see. 

Ali sat staring at the stands, watching as the people filed out of the Orlando Pride's stadium.The people were still buzzing about the win and their team's victory. Ashlyn and the rest of the Pride players had walked back into the locker room; however, Ali had remained on the field. She could feel the warmth of the Florida sun, as it was beginning to set. The crowds were dispersing, and for a moment Ali felt like she was completely alone in the stadium. Alone with just her and the sunset's beautiful colors. It was calming somehow and yet still she felt some anxiety, she still could feel something cold and dark knawing in her gut.

It was hard not to be bitter about the fact that this could have been her playing on the field. It could have been her that the crowd was cheering for. It was a weird thing to consider, to wonder what her life would have been like had she not be sexually assaulted in college, had she not spent close to five years locked away in her house. 

Ever since meeting Ashlyn almost a year prior she had made so many advancements. She had found forgiveness and reconciliation with her brother and her mom. Hell, she had even managed to leave her house and work on the fact that she was scared of it. Honestly, she knew she needed to find a good therapist or something to help her cope with the trauma she had suffered but she was still making improvements. 

Ali knelt down on the field and closed her eyes, trying to imagine what it would be like to hear the Orlando Pride fans chanting her name. Surely it would lift her spirits, the way it had during her Penn State days. 

"Hey, you okay?" 

Ali stood up and turned around at the familiar sound of Ashlyn's voice. The keeper had gotten dressed, her hair combed back and wet from a shower. The sight of Ashlyn made Ali's heart squeeze, the girl looked sexy as hell. Seeing Ashlyn was like having the sun in all its glory chasing away the darkness that lingered in Ali. 

"I guess I am just trying to soak everything in, it's crazy to go from not leaving the safety of my home, to standing in a stadium of thousands and being completely exposed," Ali replied, before shrugging. It was just a lot to take in for Ali. She felt so small and insignificant out on the field, it was crazy to her that this was her current reality. 

"Do you regret coming here?" Ashlyn asked, shoving her hands in her pockets. Ashlyn wanted to take Ali in her arms, to hold her close and not let the girl slip through her fingers again. She knew that Ali was processing a lot at the moment and Ashlyn didn't want to startle her back into a place where Ali felt like she had to cut her out again. 

Shaking her head, Ali glanced into her eyes. "No, I don't regret coming to the game. I regret letting you leave Washington without me, I regret shutting you out, but not coming to win you back." Ali gave her a small smile. She meant it too, Ashlyn meant a lot to her and leaving her house to come to Ashlyn's game had been the best decision she could have ever made. Ali felt like Ashlyn was her home, her true north. 

Ashlyn wasn't sure what was more blinding, the sunset or the way Ali was grinning at her like perhaps things weren't so fucked up between them. It felt like Ashlyn could forget everything so long as Ali was close by, like a drug, numbing and clouding anything that wasn't important. 

"Maybe we can get out of here yeah? I don't know if you have a hotel, but you can stay with me if you want." Ash offered, knowing they had a lot to work out still. They had a lot of healing to do, but she knew that maybe they could make it if they just talked their issues out, even if it wasn't in that moment but later. 

"I actually don't have a hotel, I kind of got on the plane with a suitcase, I wasn't going to leave until I at least tried to make things right with you," Ali explained, a light blush dusting her cheeks. She realized how it sounded, how crazy it probably seemed to have gotten on a plane to win her ex back. 

Ashlyn cracked a small smile and held out her hand to Ali. "Well why don't you come with me, I have a spare room that I can set you up in and we can just take it day by day." She offered, trying to meet Ali in the middle. The keeper knew how hard it was for Ali to have made it all this way, she knew it and she was trying to show her that she wasn't the only one trying. 

The former recluse simply nodded and took Ashlyn's hand. She felt a little better now that she had that anchor, holding her to the other girl. The world felt so big and scary, but having Ashlyn next to her made it seem like things weren't going to be as bad. At least she had Ashlyn and the setting Orlando sun, that was going to have to be enough for her. 

They were both quiet as they walked to Ashlyn's car, Ali was trying to keep her wits about her. It was hard to be so exposed and out in the open like this. She had never thought she'd ever leave the safety of her home but here she was. She couldn't shake the feeling that something was going to go wrong. She had flown out to Florida on a whim, trying to win Ashlyn back, but she hadn't thought too far ahead. 

"You sure you are really okay Ali?" Ashlyn asked, noticing that Ali was being quiet. In the year that they had known each other and the brief time they had been together, Ashlyn felt like she had learned to read Ali. She knew when something was bothering the older girl. 

Ali grimaced and looked at Ashlyn. "I guess I am still scared, scared of the world and all the bad things that could happen. I know I can't live without you, that I don't want to live trapped in isolation, it's just a big shift is all." She shrugged, unsure of how to put into the words the way that she was feeling. 

"Well, why don't we get some food? I know a small café, not many people go there just a small local crowd." Ashlyn was hoping that maybe getting Ali into a more secure environment would help her not feel so overwhelmed. 

"Do they have burgers?" Ali asked almost timidly. It had been years since she had a burger that wasn't homemade. 

Ashlyn chuckled and nodded her head. "Of course, honey, we'll get you the best one there." She helped her into the car, and couldn't help but smile. It meant the world to hear and see that Ali was here and that she was trying so hard. 

Almost an hour later, Ali was pushing back her plate of french fries. Ashlyn had ended up only eating half of her own burger to give Ali the rest of it. Ashlyn was kind of impressed with the girl's ability to inhale the food. It was cute but also amusing to the keeper. 

"I think I ate far too much." Ali mumbled with a grimace, patting her belly. "I think I am going to have a food baby." She joked, before leaning back against her seat. 

The soccer player just chuckled and put her credit card down to pay the bill. "I am glad we got to eat together like this. It feels nice being able to take you out for a meal." 

Ali's joyous smile fell and she looked down. "I know it wasn't easy being with me, back in Washington DC. I know I made things difficult, that I put up a lot of walls and wasn't a good girlfriend." She wasn't sure how to make up for shutting Ashlyn out like she had. She knew coming to Orlando was a good start, but they still had a lot to talk about and work through. 

"Like I told you back at the stadium, we can work through this one day at a time. You and me, we both have things we need to work through Ali, I am not mad at you." Ashlyn sighed and reached across the table to take Ali's hand. She had been mad for a long time, but she also realized that Ali had her reasons for staying in the house and being locked away. Ali's fears of leaving the house, the agoraphobia, it was a valid fear. 

Ali laced her fingers with Ashlyn's, trying to draw some emotional strength from the girl's words. She recalled how it felt to have Ashlyn's warm embrace to greet her in the mornings. She had missed her while they were broken up, and Ali hoped they could find their way back to that level of intimacy. 

"Would it be too forward of me to say that I really, really missed you?" Ali asked, raising her gaze from their combined hands to look into Ash's eyes. "Because I did, I never realized how lonely I was until I had to confront the fact that I pushed you away." 

Ashlyn tenderly kissed the back of the brunette's hand, and then gently caressed the patch of skin with her thumb to reassure Ali that she was in fact there for her. "Hey, I missed you too. I was kind of a dick to my teammates. I suppose I owe them an apology, but I am glad you're here. Why don't we go back to my house? We can watch a movie, I know you must be tired from the plane trip." 

Ali hadn't realized just how tired and drained she was until Ashlyn mentioned it. She was ready to just go back to Ashlyn's house and cuddle with the girl. She was hoping that perhaps in the morning, they could start work on rebuilding their relationship. 

"Take me home baby, I am tired," Ali said, ready to get a move on. A sense of weariness had settled in her bones, and Ali wanted the safety of Ashlyn's arms to protect her from the darkness she couldn't shake. 

"With pleasure my love." Ashlyn grinned and leaned over the top of the table to kiss Ali, loving the way it felt to have Ali melt into her. Ashlyn was hopeful that they could make this relationship work, now that they were both in Orlando. Sure they had a lot to work through, but they could make it through together.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ali and Ashlyn have some things to talk about. Ashlyn finds out the men she works with are dickheads and Ali gets some world-shaking news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So just a heads up the last scene of this chapter talks about Ali's sexual assault, so I am probably going to bump the rating of the story up. Finding Home was rated M, and Keeping Home is probably gonna have a lot to do with her confronting some of those issues and dealing with her demons so just a heads up and a trigger warning not to read if that is gonna bother you.

As the sun began to rise over Orlando, Ashlyn was beginning to stir from her slumber. She began to stretch when her hand felt a solid form next to her. The keeper was startled for a moment, wondering if she had somehow taken somebody home from the game, she could have sworn Ali had shown up. 

Opening her eyes, a confused yet somehow pleased expression settled on her face as Ashlyn took in the sight of Ali Krieger in all her morning glory. The sleeping woman's make up was smudge, making her eye makeup look like a raccoon mask than anything else. There was a thing little trail of drool leaving Ali's mouth, the woman's arms wrapped securely around a body pillow that Ashlyn kept in her bed. 

The events of the night before came rushing back to her, as she realized she was in fact not dreaming at all. Ali really had flown from Washington to be with her, and more remarkable the girl was still here in her home. Ashlyn was having trouble processing it, she had thought that she'd never see Ali again, not after the way they had left things back at Ali's house. 

Slowly rolling out of bed, trying to be as quiet as she could, Ashlyn's bare feet hit the cold wood floor as she padded to the kitchen. She turned on the coffeemaker and sat down at her kitchen island to think. She knew Ali had come back with her, but neither of them had wanted to do anything more than cuddle. Ali clearly wasn't ready for intimacy like that, and after having her heart shattered neither was Ashlyn. 

Seeing her phone blinking on the charger, Ash picked it up and went through her notifications. She had a few messages from her teammates as well as some local news people wanting to interview her about the Pride. There was a feeling of hopefulness in Ash's chest, she had her team, her house and maybe if the talked things through she'd have Ali. 

It wasn't long however before Ali was padding out of the bedroom, she was wearing some of Ashlyn's clothes, the soccer player had been kind enough to lend her a t-shirt and some soccer shorts. 

"Morning sleeping beauty." Ashlyn joked, watching as Ali tried to tame her wild mane of hair into something more put together. It was unfair that even disheveled Ali could still look adorable. 

Ali crinkled her nose and snorted. "I think I drooled on your pillow." She admitted, her tone a bit sheepish. Ali hadn't meant to drool on the pillow, but she hadn't slept well in months. Being close to Ashlyn again, having the other woman's calming presence there to comfort and anchor her, it felt good. 

"I saw that I decided to leave the bed before you drowned me with your drool." Ashlyn winked at her, glad that they could tease each other a little bit. She rose from her seat to go poured them both a cup of coffee, before offering one of the warm mugs to Ali. 

Ali took a careful sip, trying not to burn her mouth with the warm liquid. "Is that why you left the bed?" Ali asked, blowing carefully on the drink. She was a bit scared to look up at Ashlyn, scared that the girl would have come to her sense after the initial excitement at being reunited. 

"I needed to think," Ashlyn replied neutrally, part of her wanted to let Ali sweat it out, but she didn't want to be mean. "I am glad you're here Ali. I was thinking about the fact that all your stuff is in Washington DC though." 

Ali set her mug down and raised her gaze to meet Ashlyn's eyes. "I was planning on having some movers ship it to me, or to fly back and pick it up myself." Ali hadn't thought too far ahead. She had been so focused on getting Ashlyn back, on showing the girl that she cared, she hadn't planned on what would happen if she did, in fact, get Ash to hear her out. 

There was a lot of things to consider, Ali had a house there in Washington DC. She would have to put it up for sale, and that was only if Ashlyn wanted her to stay. That was another thing that they would need to talk about, the idea of the potential rejection had Ali's skin itching. It was hard to be brave and vulnerable when she still itched to be hidden behind the castle walls of her mansions. Still, that wasn't home to her, not when Ashlyn was there to make it feel like one. 

"Are you thinking about moving to Orlando?" Ashlyn asked, folding her hands together in front of her. She wanted to let Ali back in completely, she wanted to risk it all for the girl. However, such blind trust and devotion was something that could crush her, Ashlyn knew that was a possibility. 

"I don't know, I mean I want to be with you, Ashlyn. I know how hard long-distance relationships are, so that's why I am willing to move here. I told you back at the stadium, that you're my home. Home is where the heart is, and I'm looking at it." Ali stood up and moved to the edge of the counter so that she could take Ash's hand in her own. Perhaps her actions in coming to Orlando without a backup plan was rash, but Ash meant the world to her. She knew she had a lot to prove, but she was hoping beyond hope that she could show Ashlyn just how much she was willing to risk. 

Ashlyn couldn't deny that Ali's words made her heart beat faster, she felt like her whole world revolved around the girl and soccer. "If you want to move to Orlando then I am fine with that, we can continue to take it one day at a time, and just feel each other out." Ashlyn wanted to be responsible and not lose her head just because Ali wanted to be there. 

"I can have Kyle send me some of my stuff, a few boxes here and there that way we aren't rushing things." Ali was fine with going slow so long as they communicated with each other. She wanted things to work out between them, and she was done hiding. 

"You know why don't you go shopping with Alex? I have a meeting with some of the management for the team, but Alex can help you buy some of the stuff you need if you're going to be staying here." The keeper suggested, knowing that Ali having other friends in Orlando would raise the chances of the girl actually sticking around and not regretting her decision to come to Florida. 

Ali shrugged her shoulders, it was still scary to be out in public but she felt like she could trust Alex. "Alright, that would be a good idea. I need to learn my way around the city if I am going to be living here. I can't take Uber everywhere." 

"Go shower Krieger, I'll call Alex and have her come pick you up." Ash leaned over and pressed a tender kiss to Ali's cheek, that left the other girl blushing. 

Ali walked to the bathroom, feeling a little dazed. She still felt so unused to the affection that Ashlyn gave to her but it made her feel wanted. She wanted to make things work, and she was going to figure out how to do it one way or another. 

\---   
\- At the mall-

Ali was quickly learning that Alex Morgan was good at other things besides just playing soccer, the girl could shop until she dropped. However Alex didn't seem to be dropping anytime soon, the more stores the star forward dragged Ali too, the more energy the younger girl had. 

Meanwhile, Ali herself was struggling a little bit with the sensory overload. There was a lot of people in the shopping mall, so many different sights and sounds, people pushing and shoving to get through. The smells of the food court and the different scents lingering just outside of the different stores, it was a lot to take in. 

"You doing okay?" Alex asked as she glanced over at Ali. Alex's arms were loaded down with shopping bags, she had made Ali try on half the clothing options in most of the stores. "Do you need to take a break?" 

Ali nodded her head, desperate to get off of her feet for a moment and collect her wits about her. She wasn't used to being around so many people and if she had thought the airport was bad, this was somehow worse. 

"So are you glad you came to Orlando still?" Alex was rooting for Ashlyn and Ali, but she was also wary that Ashlyn would get her heart broken. 

"Yes, I mean I've only been here a little over twenty-four hours but I am glad I am here. It's nice to see Ashlyn again, to just be near her." Ali felt like Ashlyn was helping her get through the sudden shock of being in public again. To Ali, it was as though the world had moved on without her in the years she had been locked in her house to afraid to leave. There were so many new things out there, it was wave after wave of culture shock. 

Alex listened intently as Ali spoke, feeling like she could trust that Ali wasn't going to bolt out of the mall or out of Ash's life again. "I know it must be scary, all these new things coming at you. You're going to be okay though, there is nothing that will happen that you and Ashlyn can't work out together. She's crazy about you." 

It was true, Alex had never seen somebody affect her friend the way that Ali did. In the year that Ashlyn had lived with Ali in Washingon, she had seen a huge change in the keeper. 

"She took the time to get to know me on my home turf, I guess it's only fair that I take the time to do the same. Orlando seems massive and overwhelming but it makes Ashlyn happy. I can see it on her face." Ali wanted to continue to get to know Ashlyn, she wanted to see the bits and pieces she hadn't got to see when they lived in Washington. 

"Just know you aren't alone Krieger, you've got Ashlyn but you also have me and the rest of the Pride. Ash is our captain but you're welcome to hang out with us too. Maybe in like a less crowded place, but if you ever need a friend I've got your back." Alex mused, trying to make friends with her the best that she could. 

Ali felt touched by that and nodded her head. "I will take you up on that Alex. Now can we get a churro? I am starving." Ali giggled, that was one thing she missed out being out in the world, getting food made for her like churros and pretzels. 

Alex laughed and pulled out her wallet. "Come on, the first churro is on me."   
\---   
\- At the Orlando Pride offices- 

Ashlyn had been trying for over an hour to convince her bosses for over an hour about how they could use the Pride to reach out to the community and get better turnouts for the game. Ashlyn had seen enough leagues and teams fold and she didn't want the Pride too. It felt great to be back in her home state. She wanted nothing more than the Orlando Pride to succeed and bring some hope and positivity to the city and state. 

The problem was, that most of the staff for the Pride were too busy trying to make it marketable with Alex and the men's side. Ashlyn had protested that she was a World Cup winner too and that she had helped bring trophies to a lot of the teams she played for. Even though she was Captain it was clear who the real face of the team was going to be: Alex. 

"We appreciate your initiative Ashlyn, truly but right now we can't overplay our hands. The women are just starting out, we're going to market the team the best way we know how, but we need you to be patient." One of the men said, clearly irritated with having his time wasted by a player who thought they knew the business better. "Leave the business to us, you just focus on getting results okay Ashlyn?" 

If there anything Ashlyn hated more than being pushed aside, it was being treated like a dumb jock with no sense. She knew the city of Orlando better than most, she knew the dark sides of the city and what the community needed. She wanted to protest, but she held her tongue. 

She would get her way but she had to play her cards right. It was not the right time to be making enemies with the team being so new and the season just starting. She stood up and forced herself to shake their hands and hold her temper. It wasn't worth getting the reputation of being hard to work with. 

Walking to the car, Ashlyn was grumbling to herself. She just wanted to go home, she hoped that Ali would be back from her shopping spree with Alex. 

"Harris, wait up." 

The unmistakeable Scottish accent had Ashlyn pausing, she turned around to greet the Pride head coach Tom Sermanni. He had coached the United States Women's National Team, so he wasn't exactly a stranger. 

"Yes, coach?" Ashlyn asked, wondering what he was approaching her about. 

"Ashlyn I know they were giving you the run around in there, you know we have to play by their rules for now. Just know that at some point you're going to prove yourself to them and then you will be able to throw in your opinions. We can work on this together." Tom offered her, knowing he needed to keep the goalkeeper focused on the team and not the politics that were going on behind the scenes. 

Ashlyn nodded her head, knowing he was trying to help her out. "It is just frustrating that they won't even hear me out." 

"Yeah well, businessmen are pricks." Tom deadpanned, causing Ashlyn to crack a smile. "Look you're my captain, I know you can lead the team to greatness, don't get sidetracked okay? 

"Okay coach, I'll try to keep my head on straight," Ash promised, before climbing into the car to head home. 

\----   
~ At Ashlyn's house- 

Ashlyn walked through her front door almost tripping over the shopping bags that were not covering the area. It was clear that Alex had been there by the amount of the bags. "Ali are you here?" Ash called out, looking for her. 

"I am in the kitchen," Ali called, as she was taking out the steaks from the oven. 

Ashlyn felt her stomach growl as she made her way into the kitchen. She wandered over to Ali, inspecting the food that the woman had made. 

"Did you have a nice day?" Ali asked, cutting some of the steaks so that Ashlyn could have a taste test. 

"I guess so, I had to come to the realization that some of the men in the office are egotistical morons," Ashlyn grumbled, before humming in delight as she ate the bite Ali offered her. "Oh wow, this is really good." 

Ali chuckled and went back to her dinner prep. "Alex informed me that you didn't know how to cook very well and that your kitchen lacked essentials," Ali informed her, feeling amused by it. 

Blushing, the keeper looked a bit sheepish. "I always ordered out, I never had a reason to learn how to cook," Ashlyn explained, feeling a little ashamed of the fact that she didn't know how to cook all that well. 

"Let me guess you were that athlete in college who took Tupperware to the dining hall and got food that way." Ali teased her, sticking out her tongue playfully at Ashlyn. 

Ashlyn pouted and folded her arms across her chest. "I was a broke kid, at UNC on a scholarship. I took what I could get." 

Ali just laughed and made Ashlyn's plate for her, before making a plate for herself. "It's okay I did the same thing at Penn State, before the assault." Ali's laugh died on her lips, as she thought back to college. Even after all this time it still bothered her whenever she thought about it. There were so many things that had happened, she had spent so many years overanalyzing everything that she had done. 

Reaching out a hand to take Ali's, Ashlyn gave her a sympathetic look. She knew it was hard for Ali to talk about what had happened and all of that trauma. 

Clearing her throat after a moment, Ali nodded to the dinner. "We should eat before it gets cold. You didn't tell me Alex could shop until she dropped, and that she would never drop." Ali was trying to change the top and force all of the bad thoughts out of her head. She didn't want to have to deal with that right now. 

Ashlyn cracked a smile. "Baby horse can shop with the best of them if it was an Olympic sport her and Allie Long would be the co-gold medalists." Ashlyn loved her friends, she loved how loyal they were and how willing her teammates were to take on her troubles. 

"So would it be okay if I invite my mom to a pride game? She's in Orlando for business and she used to live in Miami." Ali didn't want to invite her family to the game unless Ashlyn said it was okay. 

"Oh that would be fine, I would like to see her again. She doesn't hate me for leaving Washington does she?" Ashlyn asked, hoping that she wouldn't have to win back Mama Deb's favor. 

Ali went to answer when her phone started ringing, she was about ready to ignore it but it kept ringing. "Sorry, it might be my mom." Ali excused herself from the table and went to answer it. 

"Hello?" Ali asked as she picked up the phone. 

"Is this Ali Krieger?" A male voice asked on the other end of the phone. 

"This is she, may I ask who's calling?" Ali didn't get many phone calls, so it was a bit surprising. 

"My name is Officer Sebastian Garcia from the Pennsylvania department of corrections. I was calling to notify you of the release of Chad Jordan and Michael Westing from the Pennsylvania state prison." 

Ali felt the phone fall out of her hand, it felt like ice had been injected into her veins making her feel cold. Those two names were not ones that Ali had ever wanted to hear again. She felt like she was going to throw up like a bomb had just been dropped on her world and all that was left was the ringing noise. 

Ashlyn had by this time gotten up to check on Ali, the other woman was looking really pale. "Ali are you okay?" She asked. 

If Ali heard her at all, there was no indication of it. Ali felt frozen with fear, the words the man had said to her were replaying on loop. Two of the men who had assaulted her were free, what if the rest of them got out? She tried to get her voice to work, but she couldn't say anything. She couldn't find the energy to even answer Ashlyn. 

Ashlyn picked up the phone, trying to understand what was going on and what had prompted Ali to act this way. She hadn't seen Ali this rattled since they had first started living together back in Washington. 

Chad and Michael were out of prison, they were walking free. How long before they tried to find Ali, they didn't deserve to be walking free. Not when they had robbed her of her future like they had. 

The ringing in Ali's ears was getting louder, her body swaying as her mind began to spin. "I think I am gonna be sick." Ali finally managed to say, before the darkness overtook her and she passed out. 

Ashlyn managed to catch her before she hit the ground, cursing under her breath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoa, intense right? Who saw that coming?
> 
> Anyways read, leave me comments and kudos, whatever you feel like. I hope you all have a happy holiday season. I have really missed you all.
> 
> Hit me up on Krashlynpride on Tumblr and talk to me about headcanons, story ideas, or soccer in general. 
> 
> -Becks


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of Ali finding out her attackers are getting out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this ended up being only a bit over a thousand words. Which is better than nothing, but still it's more of a filler chapter. The next chapter should hopefully be better with Ali tackling the issue with her mom, brother and Ashlyn all in the room together. 
> 
> I am sorry if this chapter sucks, I really did try my best. 
> 
> \- Becks
> 
> Also come talk to me at @krashlynpride on tumblr.

Beep, beep, beep, whoosh. Beep, beep, beep, woosh. 

Ashlyn wasn't sure how long she had been staring at Ali's heart monitor and IV machine but it felt like it had been a lifetime. She had watched as the medicine used to sedate Ali slowly pumped from the IV. The doctor had promised that it wouldn't hurt Ali, but merely make her sleepy and keep her calm. 

Ashlyn had never seen Ali, as terrified as the girl had been when she came too from passing out. Ashlyn had called for an ambulance and they had been checking on Ali when the woman's eyes had snapped open and she had gone crazy. 

To the soccer player, it was like Ali was fighting for her life, scratching, clawing and cussing as she tried to fight her way through the paramedics and even Ashlyn to get away. Ashlyn had the scratches on her face, arms and the black eye to prove it. 

It had felt like Ali didn't even see Ashlyn, didn't even recognize her. The girl was terrified, leaving Ashlyn feeling helpless because there was nothing she could do to help. 

She had managed to piece together what had made Ali react so strongly, the woman's rapists were getting out of prison. Ash had done what she could to call Ali's brother and mother, hoping that seeing them would put the girl at ease. 

Truth be told Ashlyn was starting to wonder if life was always going to be like this if there was always going to be something standing in their way. It felt like the great cosmic forces of the world were trying to thoroughly fuck with both her and Ali. 

"How is she doing?" 

Ashlyn glanced at the door, surprised to see Alex. 

"They have her sedated right now, they tied her hands down so she wouldn't hurt them or herself." Ash sighed and ran a hand through her hair. This all felt like a bunch of unnecessary drama, but no matter what she couldn't walk away from Ali. She loved the girl far too much, and she felt guilty for even considering it. 

Alex sighed and walked in, placing a hand on Ashlyn's shoulder trying to be supportive. "Do you want me to sit and keep watch, maybe you should go grab something to eat from the cafeteria. You look like you could use a walk." 

Ashlyn checked her watch and sighed, before glancing back to the bed. "I don't know how she would take it if I wasn't here when she woke up." She knew she would feel bad for leaving Ali's side when the girl clearly needed her. 

"I doubt she'll wake up in the next fifteen minutes and if she does then I'll call you and you can come rushing back." Alex didn't like seeing Ashlyn so distraught. She could tell that the keeper was worried, but also really troubled as well. 

Ashlyn hesitated but stood up, she was thinking that maybe she could go down to the gift shop and buy something to lift Ali's spirits for when the girl did wake up. "Alright I'll be back, but do call me if she wakes up." 

Heading down to the gift shop, Ashlyn couldn't get her mind off of Ali. She wanted to help fix her girlfriend's problems, but they were still trying to fix everything that had gone down between them. She didn't want Ali to relapse into a place where the girl never left the house again. 

She looked through the get well cards when she spotted the candy section. She grinned a little when she saw that they had some chocolate and decided to buy it. She was hoping that the gift would make her girlfriend feel loved. She continued to wander through the little store, trying to kill a bit of time. 

Ashlyn had never been the biggest fan of hospitals, the walls were always too white. Seeing Ali having to be sedated and fighting like hell to get free had left Ashlyn feeling weary. She hated seeing Ali in pain, all she wanted was to take the pain from her. She pulled out her phone texting coach Tom. She hoped maybe the Pride office's could recommend a good therapist for Ali. The girl needed help in a way that Ashlyn couldn't give. 

Ash wanted to help fight away Ali's fears, to assure her that she was going to be by her side. Yet, there was a piece of Ashlyn that was still scared and worried that once again Ali was going to cut her out. Ashlyn wasn't sure how much longer she could do that, how much longer she could keep putting her heart out, all exposed for Ali. 

\- Back in Ali's hospital room- 

Alex was staring at Ali, trying to make heads or tails of the girl. "I know you're awake, I got good at pretending to be asleep on the team bus. I can tell when somebody is faking." Alex said after a moment, staring the girl down. 

Ali let out a heavy sigh, she opened her eyes and glanced at Alex. "I hit Ashlyn in the face, she isn't likely to forgive me. I don't even know what to say." 

The soccer player pursed her lips and then shrugged. "You know, you gotta learn to trust her. You scared the shit out of her when you fainted, but she didn't leave your side. She didn't even want to leave your side until I made her. I like you as a person Ali, but you need to let Ashlyn in." 

Frowning at the truth in Alex's words, Ali gave a tug at her restraints. "Think you can untie these for me?" 

"Depends, are you going to give me a black eye as well?" Alex asked, though her tone insinuated that she was teasing. She moved over and free Ali's wrists, before helping the girl sit up. 

Ali did feel guilty about giving Ashlyn the black eye, she hadn't meant to. All she wanted was to get free, she was having horrible flashbacks about her attack. Those men were free now and they could come her way. The men could find her, and that thought scared her to death. 

"I was joking you know, about the black eye." Alex didn't like seeing Ali getting so withdrawn. "Do you want me to get Ashlyn, I told her I'd text her when you woke up." 

Ali shook her head. "Can you hold off for a minute or two, I need to get my thoughts together." She explained, feeling this dark sense of dread settling in the pit of her stomach, She glanced around the hospital room and the baby at the younger woman. "Do you think she is going to want to stay with me after everything I have put her through?" 

"She'd be stupid to let you go, you left your house for her. You've been making progress, you make her happy Ali. She's not going to leave you if anything she'd be more determined to stay by your side and protect you." Alex insisted, trying to do her best to calm Ali's fears. If Alex knew anything, it was that Ashlyn Harris loved Ali Krieger with every fiber of her being. 

It was then that Ashlyn walked back in arms full of chocolate and little gifts for Ali. She was so surprised to see her girlfriend awake that she almost dropped them, "B-Babe?" 

Ali stared back at Ashlyn, watching her girlfriend's eyes shift from surprise to confusion to sympathy and then finally to the most loving look Ashlyn had ever given her. Ali felt breathless with the way that Ashlyn was staring at her, whatever darkness she was feeling inside felt like it melted the longer Ashlyn watched her. 

"Ash, I am so sorry," Ali mumbled, getting up to take a hesitant step towards her. 

Ashlyn moved forward and closed the distance between them giving her a warm hug. "I love you, Ali, it's okay. We're okay." Ashlyn assured, trying to give herself some confidence as well. 

"I hit you though." Ali protested not understanding why Ashlyn wasn't angry with her. 

Ashlyn shrugged her shoulders. "I've been hit a lot before and yours was accidental. I don't think you would have knowingly decked me in the face." She gave a dimpled smile, trying to make her feel better. 

"How about I give you two a minute, I think Ali's mom and brother will be here soon so I'm going to find them and show them the way," Alex said, quickly scrambling out the door to leave the two love-birds alone. 

"Ashlyn, I have to tell you something." Ali murmured sitting back on the edge of the hospital bed. "I am scared, the guys who raped me. They are getting out, they are free now." 

"I may have pieced that together." Ashlyn gave her an uneasy look. "I called your brother and mom. They are on the way. We're going to handle this together Ali. I know you're scared but we can handle this." Ash assured her, trying to put her at ease. 

Ali was terrified out of her mind, but she knew that she could trust Ashlyn. "You got me chocolate?" She asked nodding to the stuff that Ashlyn had bought. 

"I figured you would need something to eat. So, go ahead and nibble on the chocolate, I am going to try and get you out of here okay?" Ashlyn wanted to take her back home. She knew she could help Ali work through this, and hopefully, when Deb and Kyle got there they could help too. 

"Okay, I'll be here." Ali felt a little better now. She had a strong support system with Ashlyn, her family, and friends. Maybe everything would work out.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some tender Krashlyn moments

Ashlyn had drawn Ali a bath as soon as they got home from the hospital. They had parted way with Alex, and now that they were home, Ashlyn wanted to allow Ali the chance to relax in the nice soothing water. 

Ali watched the soccer player, choosing to remain by the sink as Ashlyn filled the tub with soothing bath salts and bubbles.She couldn't believe that the soccer player wanted to still be with her after all the shit they had gone through. She still felt bad for punching Ashlyn in the face, she hadn't meant too but every time she saw the bruise she felt guilty.

“You don’t have to do this for me, babe,” Ali said after a moment, Ashlyn had been handling her with kid gloves again being gentle with her as if Ali might break. Truth be told Ali was feeling pretty fragile, like all the progress they had made was wiped away. 

Ashlyn stole a quick glance at her and shrugged. “What kind of girlfriend would I be if I didn’t take care of you? I care about you Ali, you’re my sunshine.” Ashlyn told her before grabbing a towel for her. She nodded to the bathtub. “I’ll be in the bedroom if you need anything.” 

“Could you maybe stay?” Ali knew she was asking a lot, she didn’t want to necessarily take a bath with Ashlyn, but she wanted the girl’s company. 

Ashlyn was surprised by the request and it showed on her face. “Um, are you sure?” She didn’t want to take advantage of her girlfriend’s vulnerability. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

Ali took a hold of her wrist and gently ran her thumb in a soothing circle. “I wouldn’t have asked if I wasn't sure. Maybe you could just look away for a moment while I get into the water?” 

Turning around so that Ali could have some privacy, Ashlyn let her mind wander for a little bit. Everything felt a lot like a rollercoaster ride, and she wasn't sure when the next loop or drop was coming. She thought about her girlfriend, wishing she could get a peek into her mind and know how to best help her. 

"You can turn around now." 

Ali's voice cut through her mental fog and Ashlyn turned to look back at the girl. Ali was submerged up to her chest in the bubbles, but even so, it was more skin than Ashlyn had actually seen before. She could tell by the way that Ali was keeping her head ducked low that the girl was nervous.

Ashlyn sat down beside the tub and rested her arm on the ledge, her hand covering Ali's. She could understand that this was taking a lot of trust and faith from Ali to be this exposed. 

"I love you, Ali." 

Ali's head shot up, a look of confusion in her eyes. She was wondering if she had heard Ashlyn right. Sure Ashlyn had told Ali she loved her before in letters after they made up in the stadium, even at the hospital earlier but this felt different. Ali herself had only admitted her deep devotion and feelings maybe two or three times, one of which Ashlyn had stopped her because they were broken up. 

"How can you love me after I punched you in the face babe?" Ali didn't understand it. She didn't understand why Ashlyn was patient with her, why she had spent over a year loving her when Ali herself didn't think she was worthy of that. 

Ashlyn chuckled softly and took Ali's hand in her own hand and tenderly kissed her knuckles. "Because there is no universe where I don't love you, Ali. Yeah, you punched me but you weren't in the best place and if you had been I don't think you would have done that. I know you, Ali, little by little." 

Ali felt tears pricking her eyes, but she didn't want to cry anymore. She rose out of the bath a bit, exposing her top half as she launched herself at Ashlyn hugging her tightly.

The soccer player was a bit surprised by the sudden action and the eyeful she had gotten for a few seconds. She wasn't sure if she was supposed to hug back, and now her shirt was wet from Ali's soapy body hugging her. 

"Ali?" Ash's voice was a bit strained. She wanted nothing more than to be able to touch her girlfriend but she didn't want to cause her discomfort or trigger her.

Ali pulled back just far enough so that she could press a light kiss against Ashlyn's lips. "I love you too Ash." She mumbled against Ashlyn's lips, earning a groan from the other girl.

Ashlyn hugged her then, keeping her hands on the girl's back and not letting them wander. She kissed her back, trying to pour all of her love in the kiss.

Finally, they broke apart and Ali moved to sit back in the water, letting the bubbles surround her again. She studied Ashlyn, watching as her girlfriend fought to keep her desires in check. It felt nice to be wanted but Ali was still a little bit scared to be intimate. If she was going to let anybody that close though, she knew it would be Ashlyn though. She felt like she could trust her to be a gentle and considerate lover. 

Taking a deep breath Ashlyn grabbed a washcloth for Ali so that she could wash up. "Are you going to be okay to see you, mother and brother, later?" Ashlyn asked, wondering if Ali was up to their company.

"Yeah, I am surprised they didn't make it to the hospital before we left, but I texted them when we were leaving. Hopefully, they get here sooner rather than later, they said traffic was bad." Ali leaned back in the tub, taking some deep breaths. She was terrified of her attackers contacting her, she didn't want to see them ever again.

Ashlyn was silent as she took Ali's hand again, using the washcloth to gently wash Alis hand and arm. She stole occasional glances at her girlfriend's face, just wanting to make sure she wasn't pushing too far past the girl's boundaries. 

"So I was thinking of maybe trying to apply for a job around town. Maybe something part time where I can just get used to people again. I am really good with numbers so maybe a cleric of some kind." Ali mused as she closed her eyes. She didn't want to mooch off of Ashlyn's money, and she did have some success running some of her online businesses.

Ashlyn arched a brow, surprised by Ali's words. "I think it would be good for you to be able to get out of the house, but you don't have to rush it. Do you think you'd maybe like to work at the Pride stadium or offices? Maybe do something there?" Ashlyn knew it was silly but she wanted Ali close by. She wanted to be there if the girl needed her.

"I don't want them thinking I am using you to get a job or for perks." Ali countered, she knew Ashlyn was just trying to assist her, but she was worried that consistently being at the Pride stadium and not being able to play would break her heart. 

"How about you just consider it, you don't have to give it a shot but just file the idea away or something." Ashlyn set the washcloth down, and just looked Ali over, admiring her beauty.

Ali nodded and hummed softly as she sank lower into the bath until it was up to her chin. Ali could feel Ashlyn watching her and while normally it would make her uncomfortable, it actually made her feel a little bit happy that she had the girl's attention. Ali hadn't felt wanted in a healthy way in a long time.

"When we were broken up, I thought about you a lot." 

Ashlyn was surprised by the admission, her gaze searching as Ali opened her eyes. There was a moment of intense eye contact before Ali cracked a smile. 

"You were always in my dreams, telling me things, encouraging me to heal the wounds that other people had left." Ali took a deep breath, she knew what she was trying to say, but something being extra vulnerable was hard for her. "I am not ready right now Ashlyn, but I want you to know that I do want you."

"Babe I am not with you for sex." Ashlyn protested, she didn't want Ali to feel pressured or to feel like the future promise of sex was her only reason for staying. "Do I find you attractive and do I want to make love to you, hell yeah. But if it happens someday than it happens, if not then that's okay. I am going to love you no matter what, holding your hand and just kissing you is more than enough." Ashlyn assured her, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. 

Ali felt touched once more by how compassionate the girl was. She lifted her hand, running her fingertips over the bruise under Ashlyn's eye. "I am not sure I deserve you Ashlyn, but I love you. Now can you maybe go turn on the heater, I am going to get out and I was hoping we could maybe cuddle."

Ashlyn laughed at that and rose to her feet. "I need to change my shirt anyways, do you want to be the big spoon or the little?"

"The little one." Ali smiled warmly, her face lighting up as she watched Ashlyn leave. Maybe she wasn't ready to take the next step, but she was ready to let Ashlyn the rest of the way into her life. She was tired of holding back, she didn't want to face the upcoming storm on her own. She knew that Ashlyn would anchor and keep her grounded so that they could withstand whatever was thrown her way.

"I am going to marry her someday," Ali mumbled to herself, getting out of the bathtub and getting dressed. Ali knew that she had found home in Ashlyn, and now she was just going to have to fight like hell to keep it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, sometimes you get the writing muse and sometimes you have to drag it kicking and screaming. I don't know what it is about this story, but I feel like it's maybe like less words per chapter but it's still as vital and important as the 5k chapters I was cranking out for Finding Home. Maybe the muse will hit me big time for this one and I'll start cranking out hella words per chapter.
> 
> Anyways I think Ali took some bigger steps in this chapter, letting Ashlyn stay in while she was bathing. I don't know if I feel comfortable writing smut like I used too, so I can't promise that. I may end up writing some of it and then letting it fade to black. Or convincing somebody to help me write their first time when it happens. Because it would have to be handled delicately, a lot of tenderness and constant checking for permission/consent.
> 
> Consent is sexy and so is Ashlyn being a decent person and not pressuring her girlfriend. They have such a cute bond and Ashlyn being so smitten and in love with her. It's like a drug that neither of them can stop, it's that comfort of coming home after a long journey.
> 
> Anyways I start school again soon 15 units this semester. Then if I pass them I get to graduate with my bachelors degree in like May. Then after that i have no idea what I will do with my life. So as usual if I am not writing as much the next couple months, fret not my faithful readers, I always come back xD. 
> 
> I love you all  
> \- Becks
> 
> P.S. Please by all means leave rambling reviews, tell me your favorite lines. Tell me your headcanons about them in this universe. Tell me who you think would iniate their first time, do you think they'll have a happy ending, just talk to me I wanna be your friend.  
> -


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashlyn is a little irritated with work situations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off I am sorry this isn't longer than 1,600 words. School has been ripping me a new one, I haven't had time to update Keeping Home in like almost 3 months. In other news, I turned 24, and for my birthday gift, I will get to see the Orlando Pride v Portland Thorns game in Portland in May. I also graduate with my bachelors in May so what happpens after that aside from summer school, who the frick knows. 
> 
> I have really missed you guys, hopefully I'll have more time to write soon. My senior thesis about soccer and the wage gap has been going well. I wrote like 23 pages of it and finished my first draft. College is killer let me put it that way, like my depression and anxiety have been killer. I haven't felt this low in a long time. I really have missed you all, and I hope you haven't given up on me or this story. 
> 
> Anyways you know the drill, kudo/subcribe/comment/bookmark if you want. Your words of affirmation fuel me. Follow me at @krashlynpride on tumbrl if you want to talk about headcanons for this story or something.
> 
> \- Becks.

"Fill the bowl? What kind of stupid hashtag is that?" 

Ashlyn let out a sigh of disgust as she placed the poster down on the table. She was supposed to be signing stuff to auction off to the fans but she was feeling irritated. She and some of her teammates had been sitting at the stadium offices for an hour signing merchandise while Alex was giving radio interviews and having her picture taking. 

It had been two weeks since Ali had gotten out of the hospital, and Ashlyn had done her best to split her time evenly between her girlfriend and the Pride. But she was frustrated that the corporate leadership was too busy marketing Alex and not the rest of the team. She, of course, hadn't voiced her concerns to Alex not wanting to come across as jealous but she couldn't help the little tinge of jealous every time she saw Alex getting selected for opportunities that should have gone to the rest of the team. 

"Hey Ash, you have a visitor." Coach Sermanni called out to her, pointing over to where Ali was standing by the doorway, looking unsure. 

Ashlyn stood up, excusing herself from the table and moved to Ali's side. "Hey babe, what are you doing here? How'd you get here?" 

Ali was relieved when Ashlyn got to her side. "My brother gave me a ride, my mom and brother were taking me to lunch and I was hoping maybe you could come with us?" Ali's family had been staying in Orlando to support Ali since her rapist had been freed.

Ashlyn frowned and looked back at the papers she had to sign before looking back to Ali. "You know what, yeah I could use a break," Ashlyn said, as she pressed a tender kiss to Ali's cheek. "Let me grab my stuff and I will meet you in the parking lot." She assured her.

"Okay, babe." Ali gave a sweet smile and then left to wait for Ashlyn in the player parking lot. 

"You leaving already Harris?" Coach Sermanni asked, his gaze searching. He wasn't judging, he had been informed what was going on with Ali and her situation. He was still concerned about his keeper, he knew it was hard for her to always be playing second fiddle to somebody else.

Ashlyn nodded her head. "Just a quick lunch and then hopefully I should back to finish signing stuff. I won't miss practice coach." She said, knowing as captain she needed to set a good example for her teammates. 

Tom Sermanni merely patted her on the shoulder. "I trust you, Ashlyn, I know you'll make me and the team proud. But go get some food, I'll see you on the field in two hours, don't be late." He warned, before sitting down to sign some of the auctioning items.

\---  
Kyle sat across from Ashlyn, watching the soccer play shovel spoonfuls of soup into her mouth. Ashlyn hadn't really talked much, only really responding when Ali asked her a question. He could tell that something was bothering his sister's girlfriend, but he wasn't sure how to approach it. 

He cleared his throat and glanced at Ashlyn. "Hey Ashlyn, I forgot something in the car, would you mind coming with me to get it?" Kyle asked after a moment, knowing he could trust her to keep him company.

Getting her alone and away from Ali was the plan. He wanted to see what was up with the keeper and why she looked like somebody had brutally murdered her puppy. 

Ashlyn looked confused but shrugged. “Yeah sure.” She got up and pressed a kiss to Ali’s cheek who also looked confused by the whole situation. Following Kyle out of the restaurant and to the car, Ashlyn just wanted to know what he wanted. 

“What’s wrong Kyle?” Ashlyn asked, unsure of why he had made an excuse for them to leave. 

“Something is bothering you, I can tell, but what is it?” Kyle asked, ever as blunt as always. He wasn’t the type to beat around the bush, he’d just ask straight up. He leaned against his car, folding his arms over his chest. 

A heavy sigh tore from the keeper and she seemingly deflated a bit. She felt like she had been caring the weight of the world on her shoulders and she didn't know how to vocalize that she needed help. 

"I don't even know where to start Kyle," Ashlyn admitted, running a hand through her hair in frustration. "I am worried about your sister and her attackers getting out prison. At the same time, I am trying to raise my club team higher and get more promotional deals because now that your sister is living with me I need to be able to support us." 

Kyle frowned and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Ali doesn't need you to be breaking your back to support her. She has money, she's actually quite talented at running websites and making things to sell. Have you tried talking to her?" 

Ashlyn shook her head and stared at the ground. "No, I figured she had enough on her plate."

"She's your girlfriend, she cares about you." Kyle had seen Ali struggle for so long to open up to somebody. Ashlyn was somebody that made her happy, even just by being around. "Talk to her okay?"

Ashlyn gave a small smile and a nod, deciding that maybe having a conversation with her girlfriend would make her feel better. "Alright Kyle, thanks for this chat. I will talk to her after practice tonight."

"We're family now, somebody has got to keep you in check." Kyle gave her a hug and then led the way back inside of the restaurant.

\---  
"Ah, it feels so good to be home," Ali commented as she unlocked the door to her and Ashlyn's house. It still felt odd to call it their house, but it also made her heart beat in a funny way. It felt like she had been in Orlando a whole month now, but she was still finding new things to do. 

She had spent the last couple of hours, watching Ashlyn at practice, so she was looking forward to just cuddling up with her girlfriend and spending some quality time together. 

The keeper had just finished grabbing her gear and dragging it through the door when she saw Ali sitting on the couch. It was a sight that never failed to take her breath away, Ali was here with her in Orlando. She set her gear down and walked over, pressing a tender kiss to her girlfriend's lips. 

"I love you, Ali," Ashlyn mumbled against her lips, humming softly before pulling back. Ash meant it too, she had never been more in love with another person. Ali was somebody who could make her feel like her world was spinning the right way. Ash sat down next to her on the couch and took Ali's hand in her own. 

Blushing a little, Ali played with Ashlyn's fingers. "I love you too Ash." She kissed the back of her girlfriend's hand and then snuggled into her chest, listening to her heartbeat. "So what were you and my brother talking about at lunch today?" 

Ashlyn ran her fingers through Ali's hair, just playing with it. "I guess I've just been overwhelmed lately," Ashlyn admitted, knowing she needed to talk to her girlfriend and be honest. Communication was key after all, and she wanted to be a team player. 

Ali's gaze filled with concern and she gave her girlfriend a tighter hug. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I guess I am just worried about providing a future for us. I mean with your attackers out of prison I feel like I need to be close by to protect you. Then there is the fact that the Orlando Pride's captain's armband should mean that I get sponsorship opportunities. The pride is consistently only promoting Alex and not the rest of the team. I love Alex, you know I do but the rest of us bring so much to the table." 

Ali grimaced and kissed Ashlyn's cheek, she hadn't realized that it meant so much to her girlfriend. She knew just how hard Ashlyn had been working to prove herself and she wanted to be there to help her feel better. 

"You are going to have to lead by example baby. If you want sponsorships then get out there and earn them. I'll help you, I'll promote the hell out of you and the Pride." Ali offered, caressing her cheek. She wanted to be supportive of her girlfriend. 

"Wait, really?" Ashlyn hadn't thought of that, but now that she was it seemed like a great idea. Sure mixing business and pleasure could be dangerous, but they could also have a lot of fun with it. "You'd be my social media manager?" 

Ali giggled and shrugged her shoulders. "It's not like I have another job, and maybe it would give me some more time to spend with you." She straddled Ashlyn's lap and kissed her deeply, sucking lightly on her lower lip. "Does my new promotion come with perks Ash?" She asked with a teasing smile. 

Ashlyn growled playfully. "Hell yeah baby, the best perks. I have to make sure my new social media manager is nice and happy." She purred, scooping her up in her arms. "Now, let's go to bed." 

Ali nodded her head, knowing their night would probably consist of making out but she was okay with that. She liked being in Ashlyn's arms, it was her safe place now, her home.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashlyn and Ali have a heart to heart about some stuff.

Ali couldn't really deny the fact that she loved spending time with Ashlyn. It had been about two weeks since she had become her girlfriend's social media manager and it was working well. She had gotten Ashlyn another eight thousand followers on Instagram and Twitter, while also helping her highlight some of the issues the girl cared about. 

To Ali, all those numbers didn't mean much to her. All she cared about was making her girlfriend happy and trying to stay distracted from the stress going on in her own life. Ali had found that focusing on Ashlyn and helping her promote the Pride and her own brand was a lot easier than trying to deal with the fact that her attackers were now free. 

She had received another courtesy call telling her that the two men were on parole and ordered to have no contact with her, it didn't make her feel any safer though. Ali still felt like she was having to look over her shoulder like at any minute she was going to see their faces again. It wasn't like their faces had actually ever stopped haunting her dreams. 

She hadn't been sleeping as well as she should have, instead, she was using some of the time she was up to edit pictures for Ashlyn or to think of new ways to properly promote her girlfriend's career. Perhaps it was unhealthy to be so solar-focused on something, Ali tried not to think of it that way. She didn't want to end up crying or something. 

"That should just about do it," Ali said softly to herself, as she finished adding the latest filter to a picture of Ashlyn facing towards a sunset. The way that the shadows had fallen across her girlfriend's back, had been magical. Ashlyn had on her goalkeeper gloves and she was facing the sun as if it was a giant soccer ball trying to keep past her. It was a beautiful pose and Ali could have sworn she felt herself fall deeper in love with Ashlyn just from the picture. 

"Hey, babe," Ashlyn called as she padded out of their bedroom. She was wearing just a sports bra and some soccer shorts, having slept in just that. 

Ali startled not expecting her to be up already. She glanced at the clock and realized she had been up since probably four and it was now seven. 

"Hey, Ash." Ali greeted, getting up from the computer and walking over to greet her girlfriend with a good morning kiss. 

Ashlyn hummed against her lips before smiling as she pulled back. "How long have you been up, your side of the bed was cold, have you been up long?" She asked, her gaze searching. 

Ali ducked her head sheepishly and shrugged. "A few hours, I just wanted to get a head start on the latest photo," Ali replied, pointing back to her laptop where she had been editing countless pictures. 

Ashlyn glanced at the laptop and then back at her girlfriend. "Are you having trouble sleeping again?" 

In the over a year that she had known Ali and the time that they had been together she had learned how to read her the other girl. Now that she was actually looking at her in good lighting, she could see the dark circles under Ali's eyes. She had noticed the other girl was looking a little thinner than normal but she hadn't wanted to like call her out on it. However she knew it was time to say something, she didn't want to risk Ali struggling alone. 

The look on Ali's face told her girlfriend the truth. Ashlyn sighed softly and moved to pull Ali into a hug, just holding her as close as she could. She wanted to offer support rather than judgment, but she also didn't want to enable Ali into bad habits. 

"Tell you what Al, why don't you go take a thirty-minute nap while I make breakfast," Ashlyn suggested, rubbing her shoulders. She knew she couldn't force Ali to sleep, but she was hoping she could at least convince her to get a little rest. 

Ali wanted to protest but a yawn escaped her before she could. "Okay, I guess maybe a quick nap wouldn't hurt. Wake me up when breakfast is ready." Ali said squeezing her girlfriend's hand, before heading to their bedroom. 

Ashlyn watched her go, before heading into the kitchen to make them some breakfast. She sent a message to Coach Tom asking him if it was possible to recommend a therapist for Ali. She knew that the Pride had a lot of connections and she wanted to use them to help her girlfriend in whatever way she could. 

After checking and making sure Ali was actually resting, Ash put the food she made in the oven to keep it warm. She wanted to give Ali as much time to sleep as she could, besides this would give her a chance to check out all the hard work Ali had been doing. 

It was about an hour later when she finally went in to check on Ali and wake her up. She crawled into bed with her girlfriend and pressed a gentle kiss to her cheek. She felt Ali stirring, so Ashlyn began to gently run her fingers up and down Ali's back. 

"Did you have a good nap baby," Ashlyn asked, her gaze searching. Ali had looked so peaceful and Ash hated waking her up, but she knew that they both still needed to eat and talk. 

The brunette yawned and snuggled into Ashlyn's chest. "Yes, I did." She mumbled, her fingers tracing patterns over Ashlyn's midsection. She was still skittish about being super intimate, but Ashlyn had taken her insecurities and had been insanely patient with her. 

"Are you ready to eat then?" Ash covered Ali's hand with her own and brought the girl's hand up, so she could kiss her knuckles. "Come on princess, let's go eat." She playfully scooped Ali up into her arms, carrying her bridal style to the table. 

Ali giggled and rolled her eyes. "You're ridiculous you know that?" She teased, but it meant a lot to her that Ashlyn was so willing to go slow and be gentle with her. 

Ashlyn shrugged sheepishly. "Yeah well, you deserve it all babe." She served Ali some food and then made herself a plate, before sitting across from her. "So I was wondering if maybe you'd like to have dinner with some of my family soon. I really want them to meet you." Ashlyn said, trying to approach the idea carefully. 

Surprisingly Ali wasn't scared, she simply raised a brow. "When?" She continued eating, leaving Ashlyn with her jaw dropped. 

"Wait really? Well I mean they were thinking about coming to a Pride game, so maybe they could sit with you. Your family could be there too if that would make you more comfortable." Ashlyn offered, still in awe that Ali had agreed so quickly. 

She was beginning to think that perhaps she had doubted Ali's ability to go with the flow. Ali had made a lot of changes since finally leaving the house and coming to Orlando. Things were still at a slower pace but they were progressing. 

Ali smiled at her, the kind of smile that had Ashlyn in awe for a different reason. "Yeah, I think that would be a great idea. I'd love to meet them." 

"There was something else I wanted to talk to you about," Ashlyn said after a moment, she took a bite of her food, needing a second to figure out how to actually get the proper words. "I am worried about you."

Ali put down her fork and stared Ashlyn down, her eyes narrowing just slightly. "What about?" She asked warily, her tone already slightly defensive. She had made a lot of progress but there were still things she had to work on. 

The soccer player sighed and fiddled with her own silverware. "I was talking to coach Tom, I know you haven't been sleeping well and you've been kind of worried lately. Tom has a list of therapist and mental health professionals you could talk to... if you wanted too of course." Ashlyn knew it was a touchy topic, she couldn't force Ali to do anything, but she could extend the offer.

Ali took a shuddering breath, it felt like her chest was tightening. She had been running from having to confront the fact that she was still scared. "I... I don't know Ashlyn. I don't know if I am ready to tell the shrink all the messed up things in my head. I tried therapy.. after the incident." 

Ashlyn moved her chair closer to Ali's and held out her hand towards the girl, waiting for Ali's okay, before she took her hand. "Hey, I can come with you. I mean I can take you there and pick you up. If you really don't want to do it, you don't have to, but I think it could really benefit you." 

"What if they think I am crazy?" Ali asked, tears starting to pool in her eyes, but she was fighting desperately to keep them from falling. She felt like Ashlyn was counting on her and she didn't want to let her partner down, she didn't want to be weak. 

"Baby girl you aren't crazy, and sometimes we all need some help. Going to therapy and having somebody to talk to isn't a bad thing." Ashlyn reasoned, looking into her girlfriend's eyes. "When I was younger I had a lot of anger issues, sports helped me, but I got into drugs and a lot of bad shit. I had coaches and people like Whitney help me get better, I actually saw a therapist for a lot of years babe." Ashlyn wanted to be honest about her own past, she was hoping that by doing so she could help Ali. 

Ali looked skeptical. "You have anger issues?" 

Ashlyn laughed softly and shrugged. "You should see me when I get really angry, hell hath no fury like a goalkeeper scored on." Ashlyn teased. 

Ali cracked a small smile and wiped at her eyes, trying to catch the few tears that had escaped. "I am so scared babe." She admitted softly after a moment. "I'm scared that the men getting out are going to come find me, I am terrified that you're going to change your mind about me and think I am too damaged." 

Ashlyn frowned and got down on her knees in front of Ali, she cupped the girl's face, trying to get her to make eye contact. "I need you to listen to me and I need you to really hear me, Ali. I am so in love with you, you are not damaged okay? Life knocked you down, but you're one of the strongest people I know. I am not going to change my mind about you, even if I did, you are so much more than you think. You are smart, beautiful, kind and so talented. I have seen how loyal and hardworking you are, I am insanely lucky to have you as my partner." Ashlyn pressed a gentle kiss to her cheek. 

"I feel like a coward though," Ali admitted, she had been trying to hide out in Ashlyn's house, she didn't want to confront a world where the men were out of prison. 

"You are allowed to be scared baby, but I am right here. You are safe, I promise." Ashlyn knew that she would do whatever it took to assure Ali that she was safe, there was no way in hell she was going to let anybody hurt Ali again. "I see myself marrying you someday Ali, growing old, having a family and a couple dogs. You're all I want, I've got you." Ashlyn assured her. 

Ali launched herself at Ashlyn, hugging her as tightly as she could. She kissed at her girlfriend's neck, before burying her face into the girl's tattooed shoulder. She hated crying, but she found herself openly sobbing into Ashlyn's skin. 

Ashlyn simply held her and rubbed her back, allowing the waves of sadness to roll while still trying to provide comfort. Even though the feelings sucked, it was important for Ali to feel them and Ashlyn wanted to support her in every way. Sometimes after the dam holding the emotions back broke, it was easier to rebuild.

Finally, Ali stopped crying, doing her best to catch her breath. "Ok, okay I'll check out the list coach Tom has." She said, her voice still shaking and cracking. 

"I'm right here with you baby girl, I am right here," Ash promised, hoping that she could somehow persuade her that things would get better. She wiped away Ali's tears and gave pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Now about the pictures you've been working on. I really like what you've done with them." Ashlyn said to change the subject. 

Ali lit up a little bit, thankful for the change in topic. "You do? I really like the one with you looking out at the sunset, it's my favorite." Ali mused, she had worked hard on getting the filter just right for that particular picture. 

Ashlyn nodded her head. "You have a real talent, maybe it could be my profile picture for Instagram. I was thinking maybe you could post a few of the pictures you take at the game. You're talented Ali." Ashlyn complimented, wanting to help build her girlfriend's confidence. 

"I'll do that, maybe I'll get a few of you with your family at the next game, that would be a good one if you decided to write a sort of blog entry about that," Ali suggested, her mind already going in a million one different directions. She felt so much clearer minded after her nap and her cry. She felt like she had been cleansed somehow. 

"Before we work anymore on that, maybe we could go for a walk on the beach. I just want to spend some time with my favorite girl." Ashlyn suggested, she knew she had been busy with soccer but she wanted to make sure she took time to be there for Ali. She didn't want to let her struggle through all of her insecurities by herself. 

Ali grinned and nodded. "A walk on the beach with the love of my life? Count me in Ash."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 200,000 fanfiction words written/edited in a year. This year has been insanely crazy but I have loved it. This year has included me republishing Alpha and Omega, starting/stopping a couple of stories (I will get back to You're a wanker number 11, even if it means rewriting it and starting over), I published and finished the Finding Home, and have started the sequel with this story. I have fallen more in love with soccer, and I just wanted to thank each and every fan of my work who's supported me with kind words. 
> 
> I honestly do save a lot of the comments, to remind myself of what my writing can do. You all inspire me and I am so lucky to have faithful readers. This year has taught me a lot, it's made me have to push myself to the limit with breaking my ankle, working two jobs, taking over the maximum load of classes and having to write a 20+ page senior thesis. I am graduating with my bachelor's degree in a few weeks and I really wanted to thank you guys for being so patient and loving. 
> 
> This chapter of Keeping Home, is dedicated to you guys. May you all find 'home' and be able to keep it. 
> 
> I love you guys
> 
> \- Becks
> 
> p.s. leave me some love, you know you want too.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ali finally goes to therapy, meets Ashlyn's family and makes some positive steps towards healing. Plus they get a dog xD

The Orlando sun was shining brightly, the air humid yet not totally unbearable yet. The heat really was the least of Ali's problems at the moment. Ali was doing her best to focus and not hyperventilate in the passenger seat of Ashlyn's car. She was still getting used to traveling around and going into new buildings. However going into new places by herself scared the shit out of her, but she knew she needed to do this. 

"Do you need me to go into the therapist office with you? I can wait in the lobby." Ashlyn offered, turning on the air conditioning for her girlfriend. She could see her freaking out a little bit and she wanted to help her calm down. She was concerned about Ali, her girlfriend looked a little pale to the keeper. 

Ali shook her head and glanced out the window, trying to will herself to go forward. "It's just hard you know? Getting yourself psyched up to talk about the things that traumatized you." Ali really didn't want to relieve her assault but she knew that she relieved it a lot in her dreams as well. 

"It's no problem if you want me to stay close by, baby. I want to be here for you." Ashlyn wanted to reach out and hold her girlfriend, but she knew the girl was in a very vulnerable space. She was thankful that at the very least Ali was willing to go see a mental health professional and try to get help. 

Ali bit her lower lip, chewing on it as she tried to process through all the heavy emotions. "I think I can manage it, just will you pick me up in an hour?" She sounded like a child on the first day of school, begging their parents to be there waiting for them. 

Ashlyn gave a quick nod. "Sure thing baby, do you want me to have a coffee waiting for you?" Ashlyn asked, just wanting to save Ali from all the pain but knowing the girl had to work through it. 

"Sounds good, I'll see you in an hour, Ash." Ali pressed a kiss to her cheek before getting out of the car and walking into the building. It was formal, well put together and organized but Ali still felt a little uneasy. New places were still hard for her, but she was trying as hard as she could. 

The raven-haired girl had to wait about twenty minutes feeling out intake forms before she was finally able to see her new therapist. She wasn't sure if this would be the one for her, but she was willing to try. Ali wanted to make progress and help make her life a little bit easier, she needed better coping mechanisms. 

"Ms. Krieger?" A soft voice called out to her.

Ali looked up to see a brunette about her age, with a winning smile. "My name is Dr. Ory, but everybody calls me Megs. Are you ready to go back?" The doctor asked, her voice friendly and yet professional. 

Ali nodded her head, disarmed by the doctor's soft voice and positive demeanor. She didn't know what to think but maybe having somebody to talk to would be a good step. 

The next forty minutes of the session flew by with Dr. Ory asking her all sorts of questions, trying to get a baseline for where Ali was at. The doctor could sense Ali was troubled and she wanted to help her the best that she could. Ali had explained how she had been scared to leave her home, how she had met Ashlyn and some of the stuff that had happened in college. She then discussed some of her fears, why she had been so sad when Ashlyn left and how she had finally faced some of her demons.

"So why did you come to Orlando?" The woman asked, her gaze searching. 

Ali had to think about it for a long moment. "I came to Orlando to get back with my girlfriend. Ashlyn plays for the local soccer team and just... I didn't want to let her walk out of my life and give up on what we had." 

Megs looked impressed by that. "So after years of not leaving your house, you finally did? What is it about the relationship that gave you the strength to do so?" The therapist asked, gently prodding with her words at the walls that Ali still had constructed around herself. 

Thinking about Ashlyn caused a smile to cross Ali's features. "She makes me feel safer than any home with four walls could. She encourages me to get better but still allows me the space I need to sort stuff out. We aren't perfect but I feel like I can trust her and trust is a big thing for me." 

"So you aren't worried about you two being too co-dependent on each other?" Dr. Ory gave Ali a searching look. 

"I don't think Ashlyn would let us become that way, but I think I am my own person. I try to do things outside of her, but she's like my safety blanket in a lot of ways." Ali shrugged her shoulders. She didn't think that they were too wrapped up in each other but she appreciated that her therapist wasn't really pulling punches and actually making her think about things. 

Dr. Ory scribbled down some notes and then gave Ali a warm nod. "You know it's okay to be scared sometimes. I think everybody is scared of the future and they fear bad things from their past might come back, but you don't have to worry too much. You are stronger than you think and if you made room in your heart for Ashlyn, maybe you can make room in your life for new friends and other areas of growth." The woman said, trying to encourage Ali to open up to other people and not just her girlfriend. 

Ali thought about it and then smiled. "You're right, thank you Doc."

"Well our time is up, I'll see you again for our next session in two weeks?" Dr. Ory stood up and shook Ali's hand firmly, a look of respect in her eyes. 

"See you then Doc," Ali said, before walking out to the car where Ashlyn was waiting just like she had promised. It warmed Ali's heart to know that her girlfriend was doing her best to be accountable. "Hey, baby."

Ashlyn leaned over and kissed her cheek. "Hey Al, did you have a good session?" The keeper asked handing Ali her drink. She didn't want to pry into the girl's personal business but she wanted to make sure that Ali was okay.

"It was good, it went better than I thought. I have another appointment in two weeks." Ali explained, thanking Ashlyn for her Starbucks before drinking it. It meant a lot to her that Ashlyn remembered what kind of drink she liked. 

Ashlyn smiled at her and started the car. "I am proud of you for giving it an honest try babe. I know how hard you're working, anyways do you want to come to practice with me?"

"Yeah, I think I would like that. I can get some pictures of you practicing." Ali just wanted to spend some time with Ashlyn, therapy had been good but it left her feeling a little bit exposed and vulnerable. Being with Ashlyn was familiar and she knew the girl would look out for her.

Ashlyn felt her heart squeeze with love for the girl. "Alright baby, that sounds good." She loved when Ali came to practice because honestly, Ashlyn was so in love and kind of wanted to show her off. She wanted to also show off for her girlfriend because she knew when she made big saves Ali would give her the biggest smile. 

Ali shyly ducked her head, there was something about the way that Ashlyn looked at her like she had hung the stars. She didn't know if she always deserved Ashlyn's love but she'd take it. Being with her girlfriend had Ali feeling like she was safe and on cloud nine. 

The drive to practice wasn't a long one but it was a happy one. Ashlyn insisted on singing a mix of country and top forty pop hits to Ali. Serenading her with love songs and being over the top to try and make her smile and happy. 

Ali wrinkled her nose and kissed her girlfriend's cheek gently. "You're something else love, but I don't think I would trade you for the world," Ali promised, giving her a proper kiss once the keeper parked the car. 

Ashlyn gave a goofy smile and kissed her back. "Go ahead and sit on the field seats, I need to go change but just tell them you're with me." The Orlando Pride staff was used to seeing Ali around now so they didn't stop her. 

Ashlyn walked to the locker room, leaving Ali to go sit on the stands. The opposing team that was playing the Pride, was just leaving the field after their own training session. 

"I see somehow Ashlyn got you out of your house."

Ali turned, pleasantly surprised to see Heather O'Reilly approaching her. She had missed Hao a lot and hadn't seen her since the girl had come to her house in Washington. 

"What are you doing here?" Ali asked, getting up to actually embrace Heather. 

Heather was surprised by the hug, but took it all in stride and hugged her back. "I joined the North Carolina team, I'm playing for the Courage. What about you, Ash convinced you to come to Orlando with her?"

Ali chuckled softly. "Yeah, something like that. I am glad to see you, it's been a while."

"It really has." Heather gave her a friendly smile and the duo spent a few minutes catching up, before something or rather somebody ran smack dab into Ali's thigh. 

Ali looked down, to find a little boy wearing a number two jersey with 'Mommy' on the back staring up at her. Ali gave him a little smile. "Hi there."

"Sorry about that, he is fast." Sydney Leroux said, jogging over to pick up Cassius. 

Cassius gave Ali a tiny smile and waved his little hand, before squirming to get at Heather. Heather chuckled and took him from Syd. 

"I should get him a North Carolina Courage jersey." Heather joked, smirking at Syd who rolled her eyes. 

"No way, he's an Orlando Pride boy through and through," Syd said before smiling at Ali. They weren't super close by any means, but she knew how much the girl meant to Ashlyn. "Can you watch him for a few while I get changed in the locker room?" She asked looking between Ali and Heather. She trusted the duo to keep Cassius occupied.

"Sure thing," Ali said smiling at the boy.

Heather smiled and took Cass down to the field to let him kick some of the soccer balls around. "Are you coming, Kriegs?"

Ali hesitated it had been a long time since she had actually kicked a soccer ball. Being on the field was bittersweet but there was something that felt right about it. "For a few minutes." She mused, walking out on the field. She kicked the ball around with both Heather and Cass, just enjoying the carefree nature of it all. 

Ashlyn in the meantime had gotten changed and was watching Ali play with Cass and Heather. It was sweet to see the trio, but seeing Ali on the field made Ashlyn's heartache with sadness. She knew that Ali had been robbed of a soccer career, and she wondered if she and Ali would have crossed paths had Ali not been hurt. 

"She's a natural with Cass," Syd commented as she knelt down at Ashlyn's side, fixing her cleats and shin guards. The forward could see that her son was having a blast playing soccer. "You think you two will ever want kids?"

Ashlyn's eyes widened. "I don't think we're there yet. I mean the past year with Ali, falling in love has been amazing but there is still a lot to work through. She makes me happy though and I know she's my future." Ashlyn commented, a cheesy little smile on her face as she watched Ali. 

"Well, maybe you two can build towards it. I've never seen you look this happy." Syd mused, giving Ashlyn a nudged towards Ali. 

Ashlyn smiled and walked out onto the pitch. "Hey baby, you having fun?" She called out to her girlfriend. She took a moment to just drink in the sight of Ali on the pitch, looking carefree and utterly happy. It was a look of belonging and it took Ashlyn's breath away. 

Ali nodded her head, smiling at Ashlyn and kicking the ball to her. "Yeah, lots of fun." She admitted sheepishly. She watched Ashlyn scoop up Cass, and for a moment she could almost imagine Ashlyn being a mom. 

"Awwh look at you two." Heather joked, pretending to take a picture of the couple with Cass. "I see kids in your future. I call dibs on being godmother."

Ashlyn rolled her eyes. "Get out of here HAO." She joked good-naturedly. "Take your nephew and get off my field. No trying to cheat, I'll see you tonight when we kick your butt, Heather." Ashlyn was competitive. 

Ali watched the two soccer players bicker and just shook her head. "I'll be watching you on the sidelines babe. It was nice seeing you again Heather." Ali kissed Ashlyn's cheek before going to the sidelines. 

"Ashlyn, don't let somebody as great as Ali slip through your fingers," Heather warned softly, as she took Cass off the field and back to Syd. 

"I am not planning too," Ashlyn said almost reverently as she watched Ali's backside. She loved the girl more than anything.   
\---

It was getting close to game time, Ali was still supposed to sit with Ashlyn's family but she was a bit nervous. Ashlyn, for the most part, had shielded her girlfriend away from her family not wanting those two worlds to collide yet. Ashlyn knew her family was a lot different than they had been when she was growing up but she was still concerned that they'd scare off her girlfriend. 

Ali was nervous but also insanely excited to finally be meeting Ashlyn's family. She was scared that they wouldn't like her, but she knew how much Ash's family meant to her. Ashlyn had always tried so hard to make things work in Washington and had really brought Ali closer to both Kyle and her mom. Now Ali wanted to do the same thing and help her girlfriend. 

"You must be Ali." A kind old woman said as she approached where Ali was sitting in the stands near to goal. 

Ali smiled a little bit and nodded, the woman was wearing a replica of Ash's jersey and holding the hand of a little boy that looked similar to Ash. 

"This is Jensen, he's her nephew and I'm her Grandma. It's nice to meet the woman who has captured my girl's heart." Ash's grandma gave Ali a friendly smile and then nodded to the seat next to her. "Can we sit with you?"

Ali smiled at the little boy and then nodded, scooting her stuff over so that Ashlyn's family could join her. "Yes of course. I think Ashlyn's going to need all the support she can get. I've heard this team is tough."

"Aunty Ash will be super strong," Jensen said, giving Ali a shy smile and hiding his face behind his grandma's legs. 

"The others will be here soon, they were parking the car and getting snacks. You're a cute one, I think Ash made a good choice." The woman had a mischievous twinkle in her eyes, that reminded Ali a lot of Ashlyn. 

The rest of the game seemed to go smoothly, it was highly competitive but the Pride managed to squeak past the Courage with a late goal from Syd in extra time. It was a well-deserved win, and Ali felt excited that she had Ashlyn’s family to share it with. They were colorful people with over the top personalities but they had shaped her girlfriend and Ali could see where Ashlyn had inherited some of her better traits. 

Ashlyn had played hard but felt like she could still go a hundred more rounds. Having her own supporter section and being able to win the game had her feeling excited. She had made some really amazing saves, and she was happy to show off a little bit in front of her girlfriend and family. 

The keeper signed a few autographs before climbing into the stands. “Hey, beautiful.” She greeted, kissing Ali’s cheek before scooping up her nephew. “Hey, little man did you keep Auntie’s girlfriend safe?”

Jensen nodded and smiled softly at Ali, before whispering something into Ashlyn’s ear. 

Ashlyn chuckled and ruffled his hair. “I totally agree little buddy she does have a pretty smile and face,” Ashlyn said a smug yet teasing smile on her face. 

Ali blushed at the compliment, butterflies exploding in her stomach at the way that Ashlyn looked at her. She felt accepted and safe with her family. “Yeah well, Jensen is pretty handsome.” Ali gave the little boy a wink and kissed the top of his head. 

“Hey now, don’t go stealing all my kisses,” Ashlyn growled playfully teasing the little boy who just giggled and clung to her like she was his hero. 

It felt right for Ali to finally see Ashlyn interacting with her family, it was seeing a different side to the keeper. It was a side that Ali could appreciate since her own family was so very important to her. 

"You guys ready to go eat?" Ali asked softly, her stomach gurgling.

Ashlyn laughed and nodded. "Yeah, I could go for something to eat."  
\---

It was a couple hours later that Ashlyn and Ali finally got home, Ashlyn was downright exhausted but she was also just excited to be home with her girlfriend. She took Ali's hand, leading them to the bedroom where she could hold her. 

"Does it ever bother you that we aren't super intimate like other couples?" Ali asked quietly, she was curious to see where Ashlyn was at in regards to Ali still being scared to be super intimate.

Ashlyn sighed softly and brushed Ali's hair back from her face. "Baby we could never have sex and I would still love you and still be here. You've been through a lot and I just want you to know I love you. I won't leave." Ashlyn assured her. She found her girlfriend attractive as hell and she did want to be with her. However, Ashlyn was never going to force herself on Ali or intentionally make the girl uncomfortable. 

"I don't think I am ready to go all the way, but maybe we could take some small steps?" Ali asked softly, it was one of the things she had talked about with her therapist. Ashlyn was her home and one of the few people she trusted completely. "Maybe just some over the clothes stuff." 

Ashlyn watched her girlfriend, trying to figure out if she was being serious or not. "Baby we really don't have to do that. I don't want you to be uncomfortable. I love you and I feel lucky enough to be able to kiss you and hold your hand." Ashlyn promised, she didn't want Ali to compromise herself. 

Ali gently took Ashlyn's hand and placed it on her stomach. "Just baby steps yeah?" She looked nervous, and it broke Ashlyn's heart.

Ashlyn gently nuzzled her girlfriend kissing her jaw before pulling back and shaking her head. "We can do baby steps, but my love... I am not going to touch you like that unless it is a one-hundred percent yes. I need you to be comfortable and really sure okay? I am fine with waiting, even if I have to wait forever. You're worth it to me." Ashlyn said softly, moving her hand to Ali's own hand. 

Ali felt a little emotional and snuggled into Ashlyn's chest. She wasn't sure how she had gotten so lucky, having somebody as amazing as the keeper in her life. She laid her head on the girl's chest. "We'll go slow but tonight I think cuddling is good."

"Cuddling it is then Kriegs," Ashlyn promised, wrapping Ali protectively in her arms and kissing her shoulder. "This okay?"

"It's perfect." Ali sighed happily and breathed in her girlfriend's scent. "Can we... can we get a dog babe?" It was such a random request but Ali felt like it would make her feel happy. The therapist had recommended it too because it would give Ali some company while Ashlyn traveled for club and country. 

Ashlyn only had to think about it for a moment, the soccer player's face lighting up. "That sounds good to me, we can pick one out in the morning from the shelter babe."  
\---

The next day the couple went to the local pound. Ashlyn had spent a lot of time at the pound when she was younger volunteering and trying to take random dogs for a walk to keep her out of trouble. With her first big paycheck, she had donated fifty dollars to help feed the animals so she was excited to be back.

Ali wanted to adopt all the dogs and cats but she knew they could only get one. She wanted to pick out the right dog, who would be active enough for Ashlyn while still be calming enough for her. They had narrowed it down to a couple of different dogs when Ali spotted a puppy laying towards the back playing by itself. 

"That one!" Ali said pointing at the little girl dog. It was chewing on a bone, shy looking and yet it still wanted to be near to the other dogs. "It's beautiful."

Ashlyn chuckled and walked over to check on it, scooping up the dog. The dog gave a low pitiful little whimper and snuggled into Ashlyn's chest, licking at her neck and face. "She is awfully cute just like you." Ashlyn set the dog down next to Ali. 

Ali let the little puppy sniff her hand before it wagged his little tail. It had a beautiful black and brown coat and Ali could feel herself falling in love as she watched the puppy try to play and end up tripping over its own feet. 

"This is the one," Ali said a nod or approval.

"We'll take that one, what are we gonna name it?" Ashlyn inquired, paying the fee to adopt the dog. 

"hmmm, how about Logan?" Ali suggested, her eyes full of love for the dog and her partner. 

"Logan Krieger-Harris has a nice ring to it." Ashlyn smiled as the words rolled off her tongue. Yeah, it sounded just right to her, like fate somehow. "Well we got us a dog, why don't we go buy it some cute stuff."

Ali lit up and have Logan a little squeeze. "Come on Logan, we're gonna make you into a princess and spoil you." It had been a long time since Ali had had a pet. But she was excited, it felt meant to be, a sort of baby step. 

It felt like a piece of the puzzle was falling into the place and making Ashlyn's house feel a lot more like a home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I know it's been like 2 months since I updated last, I am sorry. But here you go, almost 4,000 words later. I hope you enjoy it. I was so excited when the pride won yesterday. Anyways I love you guys, leave me some love/validation/kudos and comments. Make me art or send me headcanons about Keeping Home or my other stories. Heck ask me questions about the story, love me, be my friends on tumblr @krashlynpride
> 
> Anyways I hope you all are sticking with the story.
> 
> \- Becks


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Somebody from Ali's past comes back to haunt her.

Ali had gotten up early and had taken Logan for a walk along the beach near her and Ashlyn's house. The sun was shining on the water and it felt like a great day. They had made it pretty far down the beach, Logan seemed to be enjoying it. But there was something that was nagging at the girl, something that she couldn't quite shake. She tried to focus on Logan and how hyper the puppy was. Ali had just started heading back towards her house when she spotted somebody in her peripheral vision. She chanced a glance out of the corner of her eye and tugged at Logan's leash, trying to guide the dog quickly back towards the house. 

The thing, whatever or whoever it was, seemed to be getting closer. Ali could make out a dark black hoodie, which for the beach seemed to be unusual wear. It reached out to touch her elbow and Ali quickly jerked away, ready to defend herself. 

The person staring back at her, took Ali a few seconds to place but once she did it was like her blood ran cold and she was frozen to the spot. For as long as she lived, Ali knew she would never forget that face. It didn't matter if five years had passed since she last saw them, or if it had been twenty years.

"Krieger." 

Ali flinched at the sound of the man's voice, flashbacks of that night coming back to her mind. She had hoped and prayed to God that she would never see Chad Jordan again. But here he was standing in front of her like some kind of living nightmare. 

He looked a lot different now, different than when she had seen him in court, different than when he had been forcing himself on her. His hair was cropped short, his boyish features replaced by a haggard expression. It was clear the last five years in prison had shaken him, he looked like a hollowed version of himself, but that did nothing to vindicate Ali. 

Whatever had broken inside of him during prison, Ali felt like it compared nothing to what she had gone through. Ali stared at him, still frozen but the ice in her veins was melting turning into a rushing torrent of anger. She looked past him, he was blocking the way to her house. She gripped Logan's leash tighter and stared a hole through him. 

"I've been looking for you," Chad said, looking her over. "I got released from prison and I wanted to talk to you... to maybe make amends and apologize for all the damage I caused." 

Ali stared at him, watching the way his lips formed words, staring at his beat down expression. She couldn't get her mind to process his words though, it felt like there was a roaring in her ears. Like she was underwater and far away from this place. She tried to tune in, but part of her didn't want.

"...anyways I found Jesus in prison, or maybe Jesus found me I don't know. I am a new man and so I was hoping you could forgive me." Chad said, his gaze searching. 

Suddenly it felt like everything snapped into focus. Ali stared at him in shock, wondering if he had really just asked her for forgiveness. "You raped me." The words felt stuck in her throat but she forced them out anyway.

Chad backed off a step, his hands raising in the air to defend himself as if she was the one being irrational. "I know I did, but that was five years ago Ali. I just wanted to tell you I was sorry, I know what I did was unforgivable but-"

Ali cut him off, taking a predatory step towards him. "It was unforgivable so why are you here asking for forgiveness. I don't forgive you Chad. What gives you a right to come to where I am, invade my space once again. You weren't invited here, you aren't welcome here, I don't want you here." Ali snapped, her voice rising with each word until she was screaming at him. 

"Please Ali, be reasonable." Chad pleaded, looking into her eyes or at least trying too. "What Michael and I... what we did was horrible but we paid for our crimes."

"Oh boo hoo, you're such a little bitch. You think you suffered, you ruined my life. Every time somebody passes by me I flinch because of you. You deserve to rot in hell." Ali growled, Logan was growling now too as the puppy sensed Ali's anger. 

Chad was about to say something else when Ashlyn appeared just down the beach. Ashlyn had heard Ali's voice and had come out to investigate why her girlfriend sounded so upset. Ashlyn immediately noticed Ali's defensive posture and had picked up her pace to get to Ali's side. 

"It was one stupid night Ali, it shouldn't have to dictate the rest of my life." Chad reasoned or well attempted too, he soon found himself outnumbered as Ashlyn stepped to Ali's side. 

"What is going on here, Ali are you okay?" Ashlyn asked, looking over at her girlfriend trying to make sense of the look on Ali's face. "Is he bothering you?" 

Chad quickly interrupted, not wanting any trouble. "Look I was just apologizing to your friend here for a past mistake." 

"A mistake is accidentally stealing a pencil you borrowed, a mistake is an action that is misguided. You intentionally raped me." Ali stared at Chad hard wanting to punch him. 

Ashlyn's eyes narrowed as she finally came to understand just who stood in front of her. "You have three seconds to get the hell away from my girlfriend. Those three seconds are a mercy because she's been through a lot and I don't want her to have to see me bash your brains out on the sand." Ashlyn's voice was sickly sweet, but there was an underlying hardness to her voice that showed she meant business. 

"I don't want any trouble. I was just trying to apologize." Chad insisted, launching into some explanation about how it was part of his program to try and make amends with those he hurt. 

"One...Two..." Ashlyn started counting loudly, her fist balled up at her side. She wasn't scared to lay the man out, she wanted nothing more than to beat him up for even hurting Ali in the first place. She didn't get to three before Chad had turned tail and all but jogged away from them. Ashlyn waited until he was a little speck down the beach before turning to look at Ali. 

Ali stared after him, before noticing that her knuckles were white from holding on to Logan's leash so tightly. She had to actually make an effort to force her hand to unclench.

"I'd ask you if you were okay, but I feel like that would be a stupid question." Ashlyn wanted to pull Ali into her arms and fight away all the darkness but she wasn't sure Ali would welcome the touch. 

Ali let out a shaky breath and looked into her girlfriend's eyes. "How did he find me, how is he here?" She asked, tears pricking her eyes. She felt tired and vulnerable as the fight or flight instinct seemed to give way to just this sense of dread. 

"I don't know baby, but I'm here. I am not going to let him hurt you again, nobody will hurt you ever again." Ashlyn promised, wishing she could do more to comfort Ali. 

Ali finally closed the distance between them and just melted into Ashlyn, trying to burrow into her and forget all the fear she was feeling. There was a part of the brunette that wanted to shut down, that wanted to just take a mental break from everything happening, but she knew it was important to stay centered and ground. She had to stay present and anchor at the moment, so she focused on the smell of Ashlyn's shampoo. 

Ashlyn held Ali loosely in her arms, not wanting to crowd her or make things worse. She lightly rubbed her girlfriend's back and kissed the top of her head. "I've got you, Ali, you're safe," Ashlyn promised, her own mind already going a million miles a minute in thinking about how to protect Ali and keep Chad away from her. 

Although she still felt a bit shaky, Ali knew that Ashlyn would protect her. The girl had always been so kind and understanding, willing to go at Ali's pace, and she trusted that Ashlyn would once again come through for her. The girl was her rock in so many ways. 

"I'd like to back to our house now, I feel like I need a shower." Ali's voice felt hoarse now from yelling at Chad. She wanted to take a shower and just feel warm again, get back all the energy that dealing with her attacker had sucked from her. 

\---  
It was later in the day that Ashlyn convinced Ali to go a beach closer to Ashlyn's brother's house. Ashlyn needed to talk to Chris, and she figured that perhaps getting Ali away from home and distracting her was a good thing. Ali had been a bit reluctant to go, but Ashlyn had a feeling she needed to get her out of the house while she still could. Chris had brought Jensen and Ashlyn knew her nephew would be able to bring some sunshine to the day. 

Ashlyn had made an excuse to go running with her brother Chris along the beachfront, she wasn't going to leave Ali for too long but she had made sure that Logan was there too. The puppy was curled up at Ali's side, resting its head on Ali's thigh as the girl sat in the sand. 

Jensen was staring up at his aunt and then back at Ali. "Why does she look so sad?" He asked, trying to wrap his mind around it. 

"Ali is just having a bad day, but maybe you should go play with her or tell her a joke," Ashlyn suggested, Jensen was a sweet kid and it was clear he had been itching to play with both Ali and Logan. 

Jensen hesitated and then walked over to go sit by Ali in the sand. He sat a good half a foot away, staring directly at her. "Auntie Ash says you're having a bad day."

Ali met the little boy's gaze and tilted her head thoughtfully. "Yeah, today has been a bit rough."

"Why?" Jensen asked, clearly still in the 'why' stage. 

Ali crinkled her nose, trying to think of how to word it without really having to explain it to the kid. "I saw a bad person today, he wasn't very nice."

Something flashed in Jensen's eyes, a look of understanding. He had seen enough cartoons to know about bad guys and good guys. "Did somebody put him in time out for being bad? When I'm a bad boy, I have to sit in my timeout chair." 

A small smile tugged at the corner of Ali's lips, she wondered how the little boy could possibly be so cute. He reminded her a lot of Ashlyn with some of his mannerisms. "Yeah, he got put in time out but I don't think he learned his lesson."

"That sucks," Jensen mumbled so abruptly that Ali couldn't help but laugh. Jensen started laughing because Ali was and gave her a questioning look. "Do have the giggles, Auntie Ali?" 

It was strange to be referred to as an aunt, but there was something about the sense of belonging and family that was attached to the word. Ali wanted to cry for a different reason now and gently opened her arms to the little boy. "I do have the giggles buddy, can I have a hug?" 

Jensen thought for a moment, but then nodded and scrambled into her arms to give her a hug. He peeked down at her leg where Logan was and smiled. "Is your doggy friendly?"

Ali looked at the napping puppy and nodded. "Yeah, if you promise to be gentle you can pet her." Ali offered.

"I promise," Jensen said, waiting for Ali's approval before reaching out a tiny hand to pet Logan's head. 

Down the beachfront a bit, Ashlyn had finally stopped jogging. Long distance running had never been her thing, there was a reason she preferred being a keeper. Chris came to a stop beside her, his gaze drifting from her back towards his son and Ali. 

"Are you going to marry her?" 

Ashlyn looked up at him confused but nodded. "Someday I think."

"Jensen likes her," Chris commented thoughtfully before giving Ashlyn one of those big brother types of looks. "When you told me you moved in with a stranger I thought you were crazy when you told me you fell in love with a girl who never left her house, I thought you bordered on insane..." He trailed off and gave a shrug. He could see why Ashlyn had fallen in love with Ali. 

Ashlyn didn't need her brother to finish his sentence, she knew what he was going to say. "She's my future of that I am certain. She's my home man, I just wish I could protect her better. She brings out the best in me, but one of the men who attacked her showed up."

Chris' eyes darkened and he folded his arms over his chest. "How did the guy find her? Did he threaten her?" Chris had mellowed out since his youth, but he was still fiercely protective of Ashlyn and their family. He considered Ali part of that family now.

"I got there at the end, he kind of cornered her on the beach today while she was out walking the dog." Ashlyn wished she could have been there sooner, that she could have intercepted the man and prevented Ali being reminded of the attack. "I didn't even think they were allowed to leave the state, like parole-wise."

Chris frowned, feeling the need to help his sister out in protecting Ali. "They aren't if he comes back just call me. He won't be going near her again Ash." Chris promised softly, ready to do whatever it took to defend his family. 

Ashlyn nodded, thankful for her brother's support. "Yeah, I will call you. When I travel for games, would you mind checking in on her or just inviting her to go to lunch with the family?"

"Of course, she's gonna be obligated to come to Sunday brunches now with grandma." Chris joked, finally getting a smile from his sister. 

"I have a feeling she is just going to love that." Ashlyn took a deep breath and then nodded back towards where Jensen and Ali were. "Let's head back, I don't like being away from her for too long."

By the time the two siblings got back, Jensen and Ali were building a sand castle. Ashlyn arched a brow when she saw just how detailed it was, apparently, Ali was good at making those too. 

"Auntie Ash, look what Auntie Ali made," Jensen said, grinning with excitement. "She made us a castle, I'm the night and she's the princess." 

Ashlyn tilted her head. "Auntie Ali huh?"

Jensen gave a sheepish smile. "I like Auntie Ali. She makes you smile real big like this." Jensen said, trying to mimic his aunt's smile whenever she saw Ali.

Ashlyn blushed a little bit and ruffled his hair. "You're so silly buddy, but you and auntie Ali made a beautiful castle." 

Ali stood up and leaned in to press a kiss to Ashlyn's cheek. She felt a lot better knowing that Ashlyn was close by, and after hanging out with Jensen she knew that everything would turn out okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's almost done with school. Two more days!!
> 
> I really miss you guys, you're the best. Thank you for everybody still reading this story, thank you for every comment and kudo. You guys make writing worth it.
> 
> \- Becks
> 
> P.S. Hit me up on tumblr to talk about any of my stories but even more so this AU. ask me head canons and such. I'm a lonely person lol.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some highs and some lows that come with life

After seeing Chad and having him basically ambush her on the beach, Ash had insisted to Ali that she talk to her therapist about it. It wasn't healthy for Ali to be pushing stuff down and burying it. They both knew that, and Ashlyn wasn't about to let Ali slip back into a dark place. Ashlyn knew that Ali could get some closure and better tips from a therapist than what Ashlyn could give her. Ali had been hesitant at first, not wanting to really dive into those emotions. They were still raw and fresh and Ali knew she would probably end up crying her eyes out, and she wasn't sure she was ready. 

However, with all the progress she had made, she didn't want to regress, so perhaps talking to Dr. Ory was the way to go. So Ali scheduled an appointment, thankful that one of Dr. Ory's patients canceled last minute, allowing an opening for Ali. She wanted to get everything settled so that she could push the whole incident with Chad to the back of her mind and forget about it. 

It seemed that Dr. Ory had other plans, she insisted that Ali talked about what kind of feelings seeing Chad brought up. Dr. Ory wanted to address all of the feelings that Ali had and worked through them. The one-hour session ended up running close to two hours and by the time they were done Ali felt like she had been through a physical workout. 

Having to relive and process her anger and sadness, as well as her fear of losing control to Chad had made Ali feel like she had run a marathon. Getting to the root of her problems was difficult because it felt like the roots were entrenched deep. Still, She knew she had made great strides in her own personal healing, but all she wanted to do was curl up in her girlfriend's arms. Ashlyn had been her rock and all Ali wanted to do was find solace in her rock. 

Walking out of the therapist office, Ashlyn was waiting for Ali with a fruit smoothie and a patient smile. She didn't say anything, just offered her girlfriend the drink and gave her a gentle hug. Ali was beginning to wonder just how she had ended up with somebody so patient and understanding as Ash. She knew her girlfriend had flaws and her own issues, but Ashlyn had never once made Ali feel like a burden. That was something that Ali wanted to reciprocate, she wanted to make sure that Ashlyn knew that Ali would be there for her no matter what.

"Do you feel like coming to my game tonight baby?" Ashlyn asked, wanting to make sure that Ali still wanted to come with her. She could understand if Ali didn't want to be around a crowd or preferred to watch from the safety of the house.

Ali thought about it for a long moment and then shrugged. "I have to be there to cheer on my best girl." She replied, pressing a featherlight kiss to Ashlyn's cheek. She took a drink of the fruit smoothie the keeper had got her and groaned softly. "Babe you are the best."

Ashlyn smiled a bit smugly, rather pleased that she had made the right choice in drink. "I have to keep my social media manager happy. Maybe we could post a picture of us soon if you're okay with it?" Ashlyn had never been one to hide who she was, even if she had never blatantly come out.

"If that is what would make you happy I am fine with it. They're going to be wondering how a normal person landed a stud like you." Ali teased, snuggling into her girlfriend's side as they made their way back to the car. 

"Babe, you're gorgeous. If anything they're going to wonder how I landed a beautiful girl like you." Ashlyn reassured her, she didn't ever want Ali to think that she was less than. "We are equals, okay? You and me, we're on the same footing." Ashlyn promised, nuzzling her affectionately before opening Ali's door for her. 

Ali tried to ignore the way that butterflies seemed to explode in her chest. "I love you." She murmured softly, before getting in.  
\---  
\- At the Orlando Pride Stadium- 

Something that Ashlyn really liked about playing in front of a home crowd, was being surrounded by people she cared about. Playing for her home city was a dream come true and since she was the captain she felt like it was her duty to play her heart out. Ashlyn was always the first one at practice and the last to leave, always trying to promote the team. 

However Ash hated losing, she loathed losing more than she loved winning. The Pride was down by two and she could feel the crowd trying to cheer her on. She knew Ali was in the stands and she wanted to make her proud. Ashlyn went to take a goal kick when she felt a burning sensation flash across her hip joint and her quad. She stumbled forward a bit, and then fell to a knee and clutched her quad. It hurt like hell and it actually took a moment before they realized she was hurt. 

Ashlyn lowered herself to the ground and clutched her leg closer trying to apply some pressure and alleviate the pain. It hurt like hell and now her teammates were coming back to check on her. 

Ashlyn had torn her labrum in college and had suffered to ACL tears, she knew what pain felt like. The keeper was miserable and all she could think about was how long she was going to be out. She finally had a team of her own to captain and it was going to be over before it even started. 

It felt like time slowed down and then sped up at the same time, the athletic coaches were talking to her but Ashlyn was only focused on the scoreline. She was going to be missing time, it was just a matter of how much. She handed off the Captain's armband to Alex, as the medical staff got her off the pitch. 

People kept talking to her, but none of them seemed to be getting through. Then all of a sudden Ali was in front of her, wearing a concerned expression. Ashlyn was doing her best to tune back into what her girlfriend was saying but it was hard. 

"Hey...Ashlyn focus. We need to take you home and ice your knee. You tore your quad again." Ali was trying to keep her voice calm, trying to keep Ashlyn focused on the here and the now. 

Ashlyn finally locked eyes with her, tears starting to fill her up. "Not again." 

Ali rubbed her girlfriend's arm, trying to comfort her. "It's okay baby, it's okay," Ali promised, trying to soothe her. Ashlyn was still crying but Ali held her tightly, trying to be there for her. It was hard for her to see Ashlyn breaking down, but Ali knew she could be the strong one.

The athletic coaches had told Ali that Ashlyn would need to see the doctor the next day to be better evaluated to see if she needed surgery. Ali was concerned she had never seen Ashlyn look this defeated, not even when they had previously broken up. 

\---  
-24 hours later-

"Do you want to come in?" Ali asked as she parked the car. She turned to look at Ashlyn who looked downright miserable in the back seat with her leg stretched out. Thankfully she wouldn't have to have surgery, but she'd be out for at least two months while her quad healed, and probably another month of extreme rehab if not more.

Ashlyn glanced at her and shook her head. "No, just grab me a soda. Thanks for grabbing my meds for me, you're the best." Ashlyn gave her a weak smile and then laid her head back against the headrest.

"Okay love, I'll be back after I get the pills and the soda." Ali frowned but left Ashlyn alone in the car. She made sure she rolled down the windows, not wanting her girlfriend to suffocate in the hot car. She knew Ash was feeling angry and down about the injury, but Ali was hoping that she could help her feel better. 

Ashlyn stayed sulking in the backseat, she was in a horrible mood. She was doing her best not to take it out on Ali, but she was angry. She didn't want to be sidelined, she didn't want to sit on her ass all day. She was angry about being hurt and angry that if she didn't get better in time she could lose her spot on the national team.

"Harris? Is that you?"

Ashlyn flinched at the sound of the voice, the one thing she hated about being back in Orlando and near Satelite Beach was that she had left Florida to go to college to get away from bad influences. Particularly the influence on her former dealer, Ashlyn had struggled with an addiction to pills and had massive anger issues. She had gotten the help she needed, of course, but being face to face with her past was not something she wanted. 

She turned to look at the man who had once been her best friend. "What do you want Diego?" 

Diego looked a little worse than the last time she had seen him, his eyes were hollow and sunken in a bit. He looked like he hadn't slept in days but otherwise, his clothes showed that he had money. Once he realized it was indeed Ashlyn, he chuckled. "The prodigal daughter returns to Orlando. I thought once you left, you weren't ever coming back."

"I play for the team here," Ashlyn said, wondering what he wanted. Even when Ashlyn was a young teenager he had given off a bad vibe, but she had been desperate for a high. Desperate for an escape from the chaotic home life.

"Oh yeah, I heard you became all rich and famous. I knew you back when you was a punkass kid, tugging at my coat trying to get more Adderall." Diego gave her a slimy smile. 

Ashlyn frowned, her knee was throbbing and she wasn't in the mood to play Diego's mind games. "I'm not that kid anymore Diego. Things change, people grow up, well some people do." 

Diego rolled his eyes. "Don't get all high and mighty on me now Harris. People change but not that much." He spotted her wrapped leg and snorted. "If you want some pills to ease that pain I have some."

Truth be told Ashlyn was tempted, she was in pain but Ali was in there getting some actual medicine for her. "No man, I'm good."

"Yeah, for now. But remember I know you, I'll be seeing you around Ash." He slapped his hand against the roof of her car before walking away to not doubt sell to other addicts.

Ashlyn shivered and shook her head, she wasn't a kid anymore. She had a lot more to lose now, her job, her spot on the national team, and Ali. She didn't want to do that, even if she was injured she couldn't let Ali down like that. She was so lost in her own mind that she didn't notice Ali had come back until the car door open. 

"Fuck." Ashlyn gasped, jolting and flinching at the pain in her quad from the startled movement.

Ali gave her a look of concern. "Are you okay?" She asked, holding out the soda she had gotten for her girlfriend. "There was a line, sorry it took so long baby." 

Ashlyn sighed and waved her off, not wanting her to worry. "It's okay, I was just thinking." She explained, she knew she needed to tell Ali the truth. Ali had enough on her plate and Ashlyn didn't want to overload her though.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Ali asked she could tell that Ashlyn was troubled. She reached into the back seat for Ashlyn's hand. "You can tell me anything baby." 

Ashlyn locked eyes with her and then just broke down and began to cry. She vented out her frustrations about being injured and feeling like a failure for letting her team down. Then she told Ali about Diego offering her drugs and how she didn't want to go back down that route. She was depressed and she felt like a kid again, struggling against all the chaos of things that she had no control over.

Ali hadn't realized that Ashlyn was carrying so much pain inside, Ashlyn had always been the strong one for her. "Hey baby, it's going to be okay. I know it doesn't feel like that right now, but it'll be okay. I won't let you fall back into addiction, we can get you counseling too if you need it. You've been so supportive of me and I want you to know you can count on me to support you through this rough patch." Ali promised, running her thumb over Ashlyn's hand trying to soothe her. 

Ashlyn just kept crying, it was like a dam broke and she couldn't stop. Not being able to play soccer felt like the worst punishment ever, it was something that was hers and kept her sane. 

"Pain is a hard thing baby, it messes with our heads. But I can assure you, we'll make it through this stronger than ever." Ali whispered, using her free hand to wipe at Ashlyn's tears. All Ali wanted to do was to take Ashlyn home and to make the pain stop. "I promise you baby girl, I am going to help you get stronger and when you make your great return I'll be in the very front row," Ali promised her.

Ashlyn sniffled but nodded. "Okay babe, let's go home. I need to sleep." She let go of Ali's hand and laid her head back against the headrest. She was still upset but she felt confident that at the very least she had been honest and Ali wouldn't leave her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I hope you're still enjoying the story. Ash and Ali, are sort of getting put through the ringer, aren't they? But, hey sometimes the trials we go through in life make us stronger. Their relationship is certainly being tried and tested, but they're communicating which is good. 
> 
> Leave me some love and validation lol.
> 
> \- Becks


	10. The end

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The conclusion of this story, will Ali and Ash manage to keep their home

Ali had spent the first ten minutes of therapy trying to dissect what had been going on in her life. Between her attackers coming back, Ashlyn's injury and almost relapse, she was worried. She had found a home with Ashlyn, but now it was being threatened. it felt like an unfair attack from all sides, and Ali was doing her best to weather the storm but she felt a little weak. 

"Has it occurred to you, that it's okay to admit that you don't have it all together. It's okay that Ashlyn doesn't have it all together either. Relationships much like life go through ups and downs, but it's how you weather that storm that makes the difference in the end." Dr. Ory said, giving Ali a sympathetic look. She knew it was hard for Ali to not be in control, the girl was a bit of a control freak which was understandable. 

"I just wish I could be strong for Ashlyn like she has been for me, but I feel like I'm made more out of sand than stone." Ali had opened up a lot in therapy, but it was still hard to dig into her past sometimes. 

The therapist nodded slowly before she set her clipboard down. "Ali you are not some fragile woman, you are stronger than you give yourself credit for. You survived the worst trauma of your life. You found love and even when that love felt like it slipped out of your hands, you found a way to fight for it. You are a warrior and it would do you well not to discount yourself." 

Ali knew the woman was right. Sure Kyle had helped her, but it had been her actions that got her out of her house in Washington. It had been her own will to fight that had given her the courage to leave her house all those months ago and fly to be with Ashlyn. 

"Love is a powerful force Ms. Krieger, and I can assure you that when there is a will there is a way. What you need to do is to draw your line in the sand and say you won't give another inch. Take a stand and fight for not only your girlfriend but for yourself. Be who you needed all those years you kept yourself locked up in the house." Dr. Ory encouraged, she knew that the negative voices in Ali's head played the loudest, but she had no doubts that Ali could push through and silence those voice. 

Letting out a shaky breath, Ali stood to her feet. She felt a renewed confidence, it was time to have Ashlyn's back like the keeper had hers. It probably wouldn't be pretty but if they both made it to the end together, then it would be worth it. She had made a home with Ashlyn, and she wasn't going to let anything or anybody get in the way of that. She just needed to channel the bravery of the girl who had left behind the safety of a mansion for the warm embrace of true love. 

As per usual Ashlyn was waiting for Ali outside of the therapy appointment. Even depressed and on crutches, Ashlyn still insisted on being there to comfort her girlfriend. Ashlyn had put in her own message to the National Team's own therapist, knowing that she needed to stay focused but also talk to somebody. Therapy had helped her before and she didn't want to be a hypocrite by encouraging Ali to go and then not going when she herself needed help. 

"Hey, stranger." Ashlyn greeted, struggling to get to her feet from the waiting room chair. She hated having to use crutches, but she still wasn't supposed to put a lot of weight on her knee. 

Ali crossed the space between them and helped Ashlyn up before kissing her soundly. "I love you." She whispered, breathing the words out against her girlfriend's lips.

Ashlyn melted into the kiss, surprised but not complaining one bit. "Mhm, I love you too." She hummed, before breaking the kiss. "Did I do something special to deserve that?" 

Ali shrugged her shoulders. "You're just you, and that is more than enough reason to deserve a kiss," Ali promised her, running her fingers through Ashlyn's hair before helping her out to the car. 

Ashlyn blushed, her cheeks tinting pink at the praise. She had been feeling kind of down on herself since the injury so it felt nice to hear the compliment from her girlfriend. 

"So I've been thinking, and before you start, no I am not breaking up with you. I've been thinking that I want to help document your recovery. Just because you're out of the game right now doesn't mean that your fans should forget about you." Ali said, opened the car door for Ashlyn. She assisted her in and then gave her a stern look, that seemed to remind Ashlyn of her mother. "I won't let you stay in the rut Ash, we're going to make strides to better ourselves."

Ashlyn looked skeptical, although she knew better than to doubt her girlfriend when the girl had an idea. If Ali had made up her mind about something, it was damn near impossible to change it. 

"Okay, what do you have in mind though?" Ashlyn asked though she was a bit nervous to hear the answer.

"Once you can go for walks, you're responsibility is to walk Logan. Up and down the beach as many times as you can. I'll take you to your physical therapy appointments, I'll do whatever I can to help you. All I need from you is your willingness to try." Ali wanted to be a positive motivating force for her girlfriend. They were a team and right now it was Ali's turn to carry Ashlyn. 

Ashlyn let out a heavy sigh but nodded, she couldn't stay down in the dumps forever. She had to pick herself back up and fight to get back on the field. 

"World Cup qualifiers are in fourteen months. You are out for two months at least and probably another month while you get your rehab going and non-contact practice. That leaves you eleven months to get on Jill's radar and unseat Naeher as number one. Whether or not you get the number one, even if you're number two you're going to the World Cup." Ali wanted to encourage her, give Ashlyn attainable goals that she could work towards. 

Ashlyn did want to be the number one keeper on the National Team, but at best she had always been number two. She wanted to prove to everybody at the United States Soccer Federation that she deserved the starting spot.

"What's my first step?" Ashlyn asked softly, trying to work out a game plan in her head. She knew the Pride and the National Team would give her a recovery program but she wanted to work hard to exceed their expectations. 

"Being able to walk the dog and not losing muscle strength in your other leg," Ali replied, focusing on driving them home. "Perhaps us changing our diets as well. You won't be getting as much exercise so right now is really the time to be eating lean so that you can come back in the best shape." 

"That's actually solid advice." Ashlyn mused softly. Truth be told she appreciated what Ali was trying to do, it showed how much her girlfriend cared.

Ali snorted and gave a half-hearted shrug. "Always so surprised, I can give good advice on occasion baby." She said looking amused when Ashlyn blushed. "Come on baby, we got work to do." 

\---

"Okay come on Logan." Ashlyn felt pitiful and hated that she probably had to stop every three minutes but slowly she was making progress walking. At Ali's insistence, Ashlyn had started walking Logan along the pier and then later along the beach. It was slow going but Ashlyn felt like she was finally getting somewhere. 

Logan had actually been really good about not tugging too hard at the leash, Ashlyn would have totally face planted into the sand. Ashlyn led the way back to the house, letting go of Logan's leash when she spotted Ali sitting on the deck. 

Ali had been having a meeting with her lawyer on the phone, to talk about what to do in regards to being visited by one of her previous assailants. Ali wanted to keep herself and the family she had found with Ashlyn safe. She hung up the phone and stood up to greet her girlfriend, giving Ashlyn a kiss on the cheek.

"How was your walk baby?" Ali asked softly, running her fingers slowly through Ashlyn's hair. She had learned in their year of being together that physical touch was something that helped calm the soccer player down.

Ashlyn shrugged, though she did lean into Ali's touch, finding comfort from it. "Logan wants to chase some of the seagulls. But other than that, we had a lot of fun. I'm getting stronger, even if my knee still hurts." She let out a quiet sight, as she felt Ali playing with her hair.

"I was talking to my lawyer, I am filing a restraining order again the men who attacked me. I won't ever have to see them again, in fact by even showing up here he broke parole. He wasn't supposed to leave his hometown." Ali explained, glad that she had gotten that taken care of.

She was tired of living in fear and she had taken her therapist's advice, it was time to start fighting for a happier future with Ashlyn. Therapy was really helping her in working to overcome the trauma. She had learned a lot of healthier coping mechanisms and it felt like she had found the fire she needed to push herself onward.

Ashlyn smiled at her girlfriend and kissed her cheek. "I am so proud of you baby. We should have dinner to celebrate, maybe some dessert." Ashlyn suggested, giving her girlfriend a mischievous smile.

"You just want an excuse to eat cake." Ali joked, poking her girlfriend's side and tickling her a little bit.

Ashlyn squirmed away, laughing as she tried to get Ali to stop tickling her. "Okay, okay. You're right I just want some cake." Ashlyn grumbled good-naturedly. Ali had helped her with her dieting and Ashlyn had probably been leaner and more toned than she had ever been in her career.

"I suppose my favorite girl could have some cake. I'll make it for you, your favorite." Ali pressed a warm kiss to her lips, letting out a hum of contentment. She felt happy and even though she wasn't sure what the future held she knew that they could get through it together.

"My favorite dessert would be you, my love." Ashlyn flirted, wiggling her eyebrows playfully. She was still hesitant to engage Ali in sex, scared that she might trigger the girl. But they had been working towards it with gentle touches and flirting, talking about their desires and communicating their feelings.

Ali blushed and ducked her head shyly. "Well if you are not too tired and your knee feels okay, then I think I'd be willing to see how the day goes. I love you, Ash." Ali said, feeling some excitement stirring in the pit of her stomach. She felt downright giddy at the prospect of finally being with Ashlyn, she felt like they had waited long enough.

"I love you too Kriegs," Ash whispered, pulling her into a deep kiss. She had longed to be with Ali but she was also willing to wait as long as it took, even if it never happened. Sex wasn't what defined their relationship, it was the deep emotional bond they shared.

Ali pulled away, smiling against Ashlyn’s lips. “Come on, I promised you a cake and you need to elevate that leg” She offered Ashlyn a hand and helped her up, guiding her to the kitchen table. She grabbed a few cushions from the couch so the goalkeeper could comfortably rest her foot on a chair.

She set up the mixer and grabbed a box of chocolate cake mix. The whole process of making the batter was easy enough and soon she was putting the cake into the pre-heated oven. Just as she finished pouring the ingredients for the buttercream into the mixer bowl, Logan started scratching the door to the patio.

The chair screeched against the tiles as Ashlyn moved to stand up. Ali pushed her down gently, a hand on her shoulder. “No, you rest that knee. I got it.” She walked to the whining dog, who immediately cheered up. “Do you need to pee, baby girl?” Ali asked as she opened the door, letting Logan run outside. She turned around to find Ashlyn on her feet, by the counter. “Baby, what are you-”

Ashlyn turned around, her lips and chin covered in frosting, a guilty look in her eyes. “I’m sorry,” She said sheepishly “I got hungry.”

Ali couldn’t help but laugh at the scene. Ashlyn looked like a kid who had been caught red-handed and it was the most adorable thing she had ever seen. Her heart fluttered, a warm feeling spreading through her chest. That huge dork was the woman she had fallen in love with and she had never felt so sure of anything.

She shook her head, her body still shaking with laughter, and walked to the counter, grabbing the dish towel to gently wipe the buttercream away from her girlfriend’s face. A grin spread across Ashlyn’s face as Ali cleaned her.

“I’m really so-” Ali cut her short, pressing their lips together. Ashlyn responded immediately, wrapping her arms around Ali’s waist and pulling her closer.

Ali threw the cloth into the sink, freeing her hands to cup Ashlyn’s cheeks, deepening her kiss. She gently pressed her tongue to the keeper’s lips, asking for entrance. Ashlyn compiled without question, parting her lips slightly. A small moan escaped Ali’s throat as Ashlyn slid one hand down to her ass. That seemed to snap the short-haired girl out of her daze.

“Sorry,” Ash said, taking a step back, her cheeks flushed. She hadn’t meant to lose herself in the kiss like that. She typically tried to keep her hormones in check. “I got carried away”

“Ash, look at me” Krieger's voice was low and raspy, her hand lifting Ashlyn’s chin. “I’m ready, I want you”

“A-are you sure?” Ashlyn searched her eyes, her brow furrowed as she looked for any sign of hesitation or doubt. “We don’t have to do this, babe, I can wait.”

“Ashlyn, I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life” Ali’s tone was firm but full of love, there was an intensity in her eyes that made Ashlyn squirm as heat pooled in the keeper’s stomach. “I love you and I want you, I don’t want to hold back anymore.”

Ashlyn nodded slowly, her eyes glued to Ali’s. “Okay”

“Okay?” Ali smiled, hope entering her eyes.

“Okay!” Ashlyn repeated, more confidently this time.

Ali placed a quick peck on her lips and turned off the oven. The cake would have to wait, she had other plans now. She laced her fingers with Ashlyn’s and guided her to their bedroom. 

Ashlyn kissed each of her knuckles once, before letting her hand go and moving to the bed, seating with her back leaning against the headboard, her heart pounding in her chest. She wanted to let Ali take the lead since this was uncharted territory for them. 

Ali felt surprisingly calm as she climbed into the bed, straddling Ashlyn’s hips. It was a huge step, but she trusted her girlfriend. She ran her fingers through Ashlyn’s short hair, leaning in for another kiss. Ashlyn kept her hands still against the mattress as she kissed her back and Ali understood what she was doing and another wave of love hit her. Ashlyn was letting her have full control, letting her set the pace.

She grabbed Ashlyn’s hands and guided them to her ass. “You can touch me.” Her lips brushed against her ear as she whispered encouragement. 

“I don’t want to rush you” Ashlyn gulped, desperate to explain herself. She definitely wanted Ali and she didn’t want to mess it up. “Just say the word and we’ll stop, okay? It’s all good”

“If I need to stop I will tell you” Ali reassured her, pulling back to look into her eyes. “I promise. I trust you, Ash.” She started undoing the buttons on Ashlyn’s flannel as she spoke, revealing the grey sports bra she was wearing underneath. 

Ashlyn swallowed hard and nodded, looking down at her hands. She took a moment to compose herself, her heart felt like it was going to beat out of her chest and Ali had barely even touched her yet.

Ali placed her hand flat against Ashlyn’s abs, crashing their lips together, her tongue slipping past the keeper’s lips to meet hers. Ashlyn squeezed her ass and pulled her closer, a soft moan leaving her throat. Ali smiled and started pushing her flannel down her shoulders with her free hand. Ashlyn leaned forward so she could get rid of the piece of clothing easily and Ali’s hand traveled up her abdomen to cup her breast, feeling her hard nipple pressed against her palm through the fabric of her bra. Ashlyn whimpered into her mouth, slightly thrusting her hips up to get friction.

Ali broke the kiss and started kissing and sucking down her neck, both her hands traveling to the elastic band of Ashlyn’s sports bra.

 

“May I?” Ali asked between kisses. She waited until Ashlyn nodded her consent. The player's eyes flickered shut and her lips slightly parted. Ali moved back on her lap and pulled the garment over Ashlyn’s head, tossing it to the side. She scooted further back into the bed. “Lie down Ash.”

Ashlyn slid down on the bed, resting her head on the pillow, her eyes not leaving Ali’s, looking for any signs of hesitation or reluctance. It really did mean a lot to her that her partner trusted her like this. It had Ash feeling all kinds of excited.

Ali nibbled and sucked hard on her pulse point, knowing she’d probably leave a mark. She made her way down Ashlyn’s body, finally reaching her chest, placing soft kisses all over her breasts before taking a nipple between her lips and sucking gently.

“Ali” Ashlyn whimpered, arching her back. She ran her fingers through Ali’s hair, her nails ever so gently scraping at the girl’s scalp.

Ali smiled, satisfied with herself, and placed a hand over her abdomen to push her back down into the mattress. She let go of her nipple, sitting back up, her fingers tracing the outline of Ashlyn’s six-pack. 

“You’re beautiful” Ali whispered in awe, a huge smile on her lips. She sat back on her heels, grabbing the hem of her own t-shirt and pulling it overhead, tossing it aside. Then, her fingers reached behind her own back and unclasp her bra, letting it fall too. 

For a moment Ali just stared down at Ashlyn, gauging her reaction. Ali felt bold and yet still a little shy. In her mind, she kept telling herself to just use five seconds of insane bravery. She knew she wanted to be with Ashlyn, she just had to get past the mental blocks in her way. She could tell by the look in her girlfriend’s eyes that Ashlyn did seem to want her just as badly.

Ashlyn’s eyes were glued to her body, but she made no movement, letting Ali set the boundaries. Her heart started beating faster as Ali’s fingers wrapped around her wrists, guiding her hands to cup her breasts. Ashlyn bit her bottom lip and she kneaded the soft skin gently.

“Is this okay?” Her voice was raspy, her pupils blown as they searched Ali’s face. She nodded and leaned back down, capturing Ashlyn’s lips in hers. The keeper moaned as their breasts were pressed together, Ali’s leg sliding between her thighs and pressing against her center.

Ali began kissing down Ashlyn’s body, past her navel, towards the waistband of her jeans. Excitement bloomed in her chest as she watched her girlfriend reacting to her.

“Wait, Ali stop” Ashlyn interrupted, looking down at her face. “You don’t have to do this. You can back down at any time, it’s okay Ali.” She reminded softly, just wanting to clarify.

Ali smiled, resting her chin on Ashlyn’s belly. “Babe, I want to, if you’ll let me. I really do, Ash.”

“If you’re a hundred percent sure, I want this too,” Ashlyn admitted, she wanted Ali so badly. It was hard to keep stopping. She ached for the girl, but Ali’s consent was just as important if not more so than Ash’s own pleasure.

Ali’s smile widened and she began working on Ashlyn’s jeans, unzipping and slowly pushing it down her legs, so she could kick them away. She bit her bottom lip and moaned when she saw the wet spot on Ashlyn’s grey boxers. She kissed her way back up Ashlyn’s thighs, stopping when she reached the garment, and hooked her fingers in the waistband, getting rid of them too.

“Fuck babe, you’re so wet” Her hand moved to cup Ashlyn’s center, feeling how much she was wanted. Ashlyn watched without moving, biting her lip. Ali’s fingers traveled through her folds, exploring, before finding their place at her clit and rubbing small circles. Ashlyn gasped, closing her eyes. “Look at me, babe”

Ashlyn complied, opening her eyes just in time to see Ali moving back down her body and dipping her head between her legs, using her hands to spread her legs wide. The first touch of her tongue sent a shiver down Ashlyn’s spine, and she was unable to keep quiet any longer. “Ali!” Her hips bucked up slightly and Ali pressed her left hand over her abdomen to keep her still. She reached down and pushed Ali’s hair away from her face, watching as sucked on her clit.

Ali was doing her best to focus on Ashlyn’s pleasure. She didn’t want to get trapped into her own mind and she wanted to keep making Ashlyn make those noises. In her years of isolation, Ali had wondered if she would find the capacity to be intimate with somebody again. Right now, she had her answer. 

Ali alternated between sucking and licking through her folds, letting her tongue dip into Ashlyn’s entrance, the keeper’s moans getting louder and louder. She moved her right hand up Ashlyn’s thigh and slowly slid two fingers into her. 

“Fuck Ali” Ashlyn moaned as she used her tongue to circle her clit and thrust steadily with her fingers. “I’m gonna-” A loud moan interrupted her sentence as her hips bucked up as Ali drove her over the edge. Her eyes rolled back into her head and her body was shaking while Ali continued to thrust into her, helping her ride out her orgasm.

Ali finally pulled out when she relaxed against the mattress, panting, a goofy smile on her lips. “That was amazing” Ashlyn’s voice was raspy and full of admiration. 

 

Ali smiled back at her, using the sheets to wipe her fingers. She leaned down, pressing a quick peck against Ashlyn’s lips and slid off of her.

Ashlyn took a few moments to recover, her fingers playing with Ali’s hair. Finally, Ali got a little impatient and started nibbling on her earlobe “I need you, Ash” She whispered. 

The keeper shivered. “Are you sure?” Ash inquired

“I’m sure” Ali replied giving her a nod. She trusted the other woman with everything and she needed her badly. She was downright aching for her.

Ali’s consent was all that Ashlyn needed. Giving a nod, Ashlyn moved to straddle Ali’s hips. “Tell me to stop and I’ll stop” She reassured Ali, looking straight into her eyes. “If you feel even a little uncomfortable, tell me. If you feel unsure, tell me. I love you”

“I love you too, Ash”

Their lips met again in a soft kiss, Ashlyn settling between her legs. Her hands slid down Ali’s sides, finally resting on her hips. She felt Ali tense under her as her fingers moved to the fly fo her jeans and immediately pulled away. “You okay?” She asked, her eyes wide.

Ali smiled gently. “Yeah, I’m just nervous”

“It’s okay, we can try this another time” She lifted her hands up, away from Ali’s body.

“No” Ali shook her head, wrapping her fingers around her wrists. “No, I want this. I’m nervous, yeah, but I want this and I know I’m ready. I promise, Ash, I wouldn’t lie to you about this”

“I don’t want to hurt you” Ashlyn’s voice was small and worry flashed across her eyes. It betrayed just how vulnerable she felt. She cared so much about taking care of her girlfriend and not making everything worse. It was a big deal for the both of them.

“You won’t. I trust you. I need you, Ash, please?” Ali pleaded softly, placing a hand on Ashlyn’s cheek trying to reassure her. 

Ashlyn stared at her for a few moments, looking for something. Apparently, she found what she was looking for because soon she nodded and began unbuttoning Ali’s jeans. She stopped and looked back at her. 

“That’s okay, keep going.” Ali encouraged, her own heart pounding in her chest. Ashlyn pulled the zipper down and slowly started to push the fabric down Ali’s legs, giving her all the time in the world to stop her.

Ali didn’t, and the keeper ends up tossing the piece of clothing on the pile that had formed on their bedroom floor. Ali’s hands find her own underwear and pull it down, her feet kicking it away. Ashlyn froze as she admired Ali laid there, fully exposed to her.

Ali felt vulnerable for a moment, but then her eyes met Ashlyn’s and a warm feeling spread across her chest. There was nothing but love and respect in her eyes and at that moment Ali felt completely safe. 

“Come here, baby,” Ali whispered, her voice filled with emotion.

Ashlyn climbed back up her body, hovering over her. Ali’s hand found the back of her neck and pulled her into a slow, meaningful kiss. Ashlyn reciprocated with the same intensity, pouring all of her love for the woman into the gesture. Ali laced her fingers with Ashlyn’s, guiding their joined hands down her body, past her navel, down to her center.

A soft groan escaped Ashlyn’s lips as she felt how wet Ali was. “Are you sure?” Ashlyn knew she was probably annoying Ali with the checks for consent, but it mattered. To Ashlyn knowing she had Ali’s consent was what made it even sexier. 

“Yes, Ashlyn.” She let go of Ashlyn’s hand, giving her a look of adoration and trust.

Ashlyn rested her weight on her left elbow, her eyes not leaving Ali’s as she ran a finger through her slit. She hummed in delight at how wet Ali was for her. 

Ali whimpered, biting her lip. “More, baby, please. More, I won’t break. I need more." 

The keeper complied, sliding her fingers through Ali’s soaked folds until she reached her clit, rubbing around it slowly. She was watching closely for any sign of a bad reaction but found none.

“Stop teasing” Ali groaned in desperation. It felt amazing but Ali felt like she was going to explode. “I need you inside”

“Are you-”

“I’m sure, please baby” Ali interrupted, placing a finger over Ashlyn’s mouth to silence her. “I am so sure, I am more sure about this than I’ve ever been. Ashlyn Harris, I am begging you, please.”

She positioned her hand, slowly thrusting her index finger into Ali and stopping, to check her reaction. Ali her closed her eyes and her lips were parted, a soft whimper escaping her lips when Ashlyn stopped.

“Ashlyn! Keep going, please don’t stop.”

A hint of amusement crossed Ashlyn’s features. It did turn her on a little bit to hear her girlfriend begging for her. She started thrusting in and out of Ali, her thumb pressed against her clit. “Is it okay if I add another one?” She checked.

“More than okay” Ali moaned, throwing her head back. “More baby, faster.”

Ashlyn added a second finger and soon found a rhythm, her thumb rubbing small circles over her clit as she thrust. Her lips sucked on her exposed neck. Ali’s moans grew louder and louder, and when her body started to tense, Ashlyn knew she was close. “Come for me baby” She whispered into Ali’s ear.

That was all it took. Ali’s hips bucked and she screamed Ashlyn’s name, her walls clenching around her fingers. 

“I got you baby” Ashlyn whispered, helping Ali down her high. “I got you” She coaxed her down gently, soothingly.

Ali dropped her head back against the pillow breathing heavily, her eyes closed. Ashlyn pulled her fingers out of her and carefully sucked them clean “Are you okay?” She asked, softly.

She nodded, opening her eyes to meet Ashlyn’s, a small lazy smile forming in her lips. “Yeah, I’m great.” She mused watching Ashlyn’s actions with an intrigued grin.

Ali laid her head on Ashlyn’s naked chest, her fingers trailing over the planes of the girl’s well-defined stomach. She admired the fact that her girlfriend seemed to be taking really good care of herself. Her fingers danced along the curve of the girl's rib cage, a small smile tugging at her lips as she felt Ashlyn squirm a little. A feeling of contented bliss filled Ali's chest like a crash waving, so strong that she felt it might make her heart explode from the feeling.

“Before the incident, I wasn’t really wild or anything but I did have some fun you know? what just happened here though… damn babe, sex with you blew that out of the water.” Ali giggled, still a bit breathless. She felt connected to Ashlyn in an entirely different way now. 

Ashlyn chuckled softly and dropped a kiss to the top of Ali’s head. “Yeah, it was really special.” Ashlyn had always imagined what it would be like to finally get with Ali, but it had been better than she could have even hoped for. 

It had been more love-making, tender and sweet, but still passionate. There was a trust there, an unspoken promise that if Ali wanted to stop or changed her mind, that Ashlyn would have stopped. Ali had appreciated the fact that Ashlyn had checked frequently for consent and making sure that she was still just as into it as before. 

Perhaps it was a bit vanilla, nothing too kinky but Ali felt like they had made progress. For the first time in years, she had trusted somebody with her body, with all of her. Needless to say, Ashlyn hadn’t disappointed her at all. 

“I don’t know if I have words to really describe it, it just felt like coming home,” Ali whispered, burying herself further into Ashlyn’s side as if trying to leech the girl’s warmth from her. 

Ashlyn took a deep breath, just breathing in the essence of them together. “If this is home, I don’t ever want to be anywhere else.” Ashlyn joked, nuzzling her girlfriend’s neck, keeping her touches light and affectionate. 

“I can’t wait for a future with you, where we have lazy Saturdays full of kisses and movies.” Ali had been discussing her future with Ashlyn a lot in therapy. Her therapist had challenged her to write out some hopes and some dreams that she could keep for herself or share with Ash. 

Ashlyn smiled and closed her eyes, thinking about how happy it would make her embrace a future with Ali. They had come so far and all the Florida native wanted was to continue to have a happy life with Ali. 

“How’s the knee babe?” Ali asked, knowing her girlfriend was probably exhausted. She was feeling a little exhausted as well, but happier than anything else.

"I suppose it could be worse." Ashlyn gave a noncommittal shrug. “It hurts a bit, but otherwise I’m okay. Some days are worse than others, but I think a nap would do me some good. You wore me out baby girl.” 

Ali nodded and nuzzled her. “That sounds good. I know Kyle is coming over later this evening, so why don’t I make a trip to the store and let you have a nap.” Ali suggested already sliding out of bed to put her clothes back on. 

Ashlyn couldn’t help but pout at the loss of body heat. “You will come back, right? I can’t chase you too far on a bum knee.” She was half joking, but there was a piece of her that worried Ali was going to freak out about them having sex and make a run for it. 

Ali frowned and leaned over to kiss Ashlyn soundly. “Hey, I’ll come back baby. You’re stuck with me until the end of time.” She assured the soccer player, wanting Ashlyn to have some faith in her. “Now sleep.”

Too tired to really argue or protest, Ashlyn kissed her softly and then laid back down. Ali covered her up and tucked her in, before leaving to the store. 

Once she got in the car Ali took a deep breath, fixing her hair in the mirror. She felt happy and also kind of emotional, it had been so long since she felt that kind of way about somebody. She called her brother, needing to talk to him. 

"Hey, baby girl." Kyle greeted, once he had picked up the phone. "Don't tell me I am late to the barbecue I didn't think it started for like another couple hours."

Ali couldn't help but break into tears the second she heard her brother's voice. She felt free, like all the burdens she had been caring slipped off of her. She hadn't wanted to cry in front of Ashlyn, because she knew the girl would take it the wrong way. 

"Ali? Are you okay, what's wrong?" Kyle asked, his voice betraying his concern. 

"Kyle I had sex with Ashlyn," Ali whispered so quietly that she wasn't sure her brother heard her at all. 

A few heavy heartbeats passed before Kyle spoke again. "How was it? Are you okay?" There were some more underlying questions that Kyle didn't dare voice. He didn't think Ashlyn would force herself on Ali, but he was ready to go to war for his sister if she had. 

Ali let out a watery laugh, more tears rolling down her cheeks. "It was I don't even know, perfect? She didn't rush me or anything, she took her time. Kyle ever since..." She trailed off, not wanting to think about what had happened in college. She took a moment to try and compose herself before continuing. "Honestly I would have been fine if nobody ever touched me again, but the way that she looked at me like I was whole. She didn't see the broken pieces, she saw a masterpiece. Ashlyn saw all of me and loved all of it." 

Kyle let out a soft hum and nodded slowly though his sister couldn't see him. "You had a 'click' moment? Where all the pieces fell into place and you felt whole?"

"Yes, I trusted her and it was worth it. It's like with every gentle touch, every check of consent she was returning what they took from me. It sounds so cliche and maybe stupid but I think I fell more in love with her, and I didn't know that was possible." Ali wiped at her tears and let out a shaky laugh. "She's everything to me Kyle, the whole damn show." 

Kyle had tears in his own eyes and did his best to not show the emotion that flooding him. He was thankful that Ashlyn had come into their lives and answered his ad for a roommate for Ali. She had ushered in a lot of closure and healing that on their own, Kyle wasn't sure he and Ali would have ever achieved. 

"She is pretty great, but don't tell her I said that," Kyle warned, joking with his sister a little bit before sighing. "Ali are you truly okay?"

"Yeah, I think for the first time in a long time I am okay. Being in Florida, being with her, it's everything I could have ever wanted and more." Ali whispered, feeling just utter happiness swelling up inside of her. It felt a lot like hope and light, an almost floating like feeling. 

\---  
Ashlyn had woken up and gotten dressed, she could hear some noise coming from the kitchen, so the soccer player limped out in that direction. She was surprised to find Kyle standing in her kitchen cooking. She glanced at the clock and realized it was past time for the barbecue to start anyways. She didn't see Ali around and the bed had been rather cold when she rolled out of it.

"Hey Kyle, where's Ali?" Ashlyn asked, looking around still feeling a bit groggy from her nap. "When did you get here?"

"She's walking Logan on the beach, she left me here to start grilling the food, I got here about twenty minutes ago" Kyle explained, looking up from where he was smothering the meat in barbecue sauce. "You look happy." He remarked with a knowing smile. 

Ashlyn blushed a little and made her way to the kitchen table to take a seat. "I am dating the love of my life, and aside from the injury, life is going pretty splendidly. My knee will heal up and it'll be great."

"I need to talk to you about something," Kyle said after a pause. Interrupting the silence that usually flowed between them. "Do you remember what I said when I first met you, over a year ago?"

Ashlyn vaguely recalled, she had honestly feared Ali was going to be a serial killer or something back then. But fast forward all the months later and Ashlyn couldn't picture her life without the girl. 

"I told you my sister kind of went through something traumatic about four years ago. She used to be funny, outgoing, she was the life of the party with the megawatt smile. Ali was sunshine on a cloudy day. That after what had happened to her, Ali became reserved, closed off and private. She was particular about details and in need of a routine and control." Kyle recalled vividly what he had said because he had hoped to God he wasn't making a mistake by getting Ali a roommate. He had felt so guilty for fucking up Ali's life that he was scared of doing more damage. 

Of course, Kyle would remember, that struck Ashlyn as funny, but she thought back to how hard she had worked to even get Ali to have conversations with her. It had been an uphill battle from the very beginning, but every smile or laugh that she had earned made it all worth it. 

"Ali is still my sunshine on a cloudy day, that smile of hers melts my heart. Kyle even when I am grumpy and depressed over my knee, she makes me want to be the best version of myself. She makes me want to stick around and fight a little longer." Ashlyn knew that someday she wouldn't have soccer anymore but none of that matter because as long as she had the love she shared with Ali she'd be okay. 

"A lot of people have failed Ali, they've broken her heart. You're the one person I think who said they'd stay and actually fought to. Even when she pushed you away and you guys broke up, you still let her come back. That unconditional love, that's what makes me think you're going to make it." Kyle honestly had assumed his sister would never let anybody close to her again, it wouldn't have surprised him if she had chosen to remain abstinent for the rest of her life.

The fact that Ali was in therapy and actively working through her issues and her personal demons made Kyle so proud. He knew a lot of it had to do with Ashlyn being that calm yet steady hand, encouraging Ali to work on her mental health. 

Kyle moved from where he was cooking and dragged his friend into a hug. He had a gut feeling that someday she'd be his sister in law, he knew family when he saw it. "I can never thank you enough for bringing my sister back to me." 

Ashlyn ducked her head sheepishly, she knew she had assisted Ali but it was her girlfriend who had been the engine behind the progress. "I love her Kyle, with all that I am."

"And I love you too," Ali announced as she walked back into their home. She hadn't meant to overhear their conversation, but it meant a lot to her that Kyle and Ashlyn were having a bonding moment. 

Kyle laughed and pulled his sister into the hug. "God, you guys are literally couple goals." Kyle gave a playfully over dramatic groan. "How can I find the dude version of Ashlyn, can you help me out, Ali?" He inquired teasingly. 

Ali rolled her eyes. "Sorry my girl is one of a kind, now come on and let's go eat." She kissed Ashlyn's cheek and took her hand. It felt right and she felt happy. 

"Maybe she'll just make you an application for a roommate." Ashlyn joked smirking at Kyle.

Kyle groaned again and buried his face in his hands. "And they were roommates, what a cliche." He deadpanned sarcastically, though there was no real malice in his words.

"Let's eat, I'm starving," Ali mumbled, the smell of the BBQ finally reaching her. "Mommas ready to chow down." 

Kyle smiled smugly. "That's what she said."

"Shut up Kyle." Ali reprimanded lightly slapping his arm.

Kyle pouted and rubbed his arm. "Hey, hands are for loving, not hitting. Tell her Ashlyn."

"I am staying out of this one." Ashlyn watched the brother and sister duo bicker and just smiled. It was odd, but she was glad to be a part of that family and have them both in her life. 

\---  
\- Exactly three months of recovery later-

Ashlyn had always known the soccer pitch as her home, the goal as her room. She had worked her ass off to get back onto the pitch for the playoff push, but they had been resting her for the finals. This was her home, her turf and it didn't matter what she had to do, she was going to defend that goal with her all. It didn't matter what anybody else had to say. Ali had confiscated her phone so that Ashlyn wouldn't start reading all the negative comments again. 

Ali, of course, was in the supporter section right behind the goal for the game. She was proudly wearing Ashlyn's jersey and had a look of pride that made Ashlyn's heart pound. At the very least Ali would be on her side, yelling encouragement. Everybody was waiting to see if she could handle the pressures of the game, her team had played it to the playoffs and finals pretty much without her. Ashlyn felt like she had to prove to the doubters that she deserved to be there.

"In goal for the first time in close to four months, your Orlando Pride goalkeeper... number twenty-four Ashlyn Harris." 

Ashlyn could hear the announcer calling out her name and she waved to the crowd. She could hear them chanting and clapping for her, and it felt like their energy was tangible. She could do it, she could help her team win the final. 

The game was pretty back and forth, the Thorns had a lot of great attacking pieces, but in the end, it was Orlando that triumphed. The Pride players all ran back to goal after Ash made an amazing save in the last few seconds to give them a 3-2 victory. Ashlyn hugged Alex and Syd, holding them close. She tried to contain her excitement as the medals were handed out and the team celebrated.

It felt good to be on top of the world, winning a World Cup had been awesome, but winning the NWSL championship for her hometown felt equally as important. Breaking away from her teammates she jogged over to where Ali sat in the stands. 

"Good job babe, I am so proud of you," Ali said, she still wasn't the biggest fans of large crowds but she had been getting a lot better. Even though the supporter section was loud, it made her feel more connected by sitting there. Seeing Ashlyn's dream come true had been heartwarming for her. It never failed to steal her breath when she watched Ashlyn playing her heart out on the pitch. 

Ashlyn gave a sheepish smile and took off her medal placing it around Ali's neck instead. "Yeah, I just won a championship, no big deal." She teased, leaning up to kiss her girlfriend's cheek. 

"We've overcome a lot this year, haven't we? I never doubted for a second you'd make it back Ashlyn." Ali whispered to her, her eyes drifting down to Ashlyn's medal. She ran her fingers over it and gave a little sigh, perhaps in another life she'd have one of her own. 

"Hey, Ali?" Ashlyn felt like she had it all and yet something was still missing.

"Yeah, baby?" Ali asked, lifting her gaze to lock eyes with Ashlyn. Ashlyn was looking more than a little nervous and it had Ali on edge. "Is everything okay, what's wrong? You can tell me anything babe." 

"We've been through a lot like you said, but I was thinking I'm ready for the next step and adventure if you are. I want the lazy morning cuddles and make out sessions, but not just as your girlfriend. I want to marry you, Ali. Kriegs, will you marry me?" Ashlyn asked softly, she knew it was a bit impulsive asking like this. She didn't have the ring on her, it was tucked away safely in her sock drawer at home. But she didn't want to wait any longer, it felt pointless too. She lowered herself down to a knee, staring at Ali with hope in her eyes. 

Ali stared at her stunned, she clearly hadn't expected a proposal and she was trying to process the information. Very slowly a smile tugged at the corner of her lips before she just straight up grinned at Ashlyn. "Oh my god babe. Yes, yes of course Ash. I will marry you" She could barely contain the excitement she was feeling at that moment.

"Wait, really?" Ashlyn couldn't believe it, but she immediately surged forward and kissed her once more. She tried to pour all of her love and devotion to the other woman into the kiss. "You want to marry me?" Ashlyn gave a little jump of excitement

Ali nodded, tears starting to fill her eyes. "I do want to marry you, Ashlyn." She cupped her face, just wanting to hold her close.

Ashlyn beamed back at her, feeling light-hearted and a bit weightless. "Well then love, I guess we got a wedding to plan. God, I am so excited. I am going to have to call Whitney."

Ali chuckled a little bit and nodded. "Yeah and I'll have to call my mom and Kyle. But first I want my ring. It can finally stop gathering dust in your sock drawer."

"Wait, you knew it was there?" Ashlyn asked, blushing at the fact that apparently, she wasn't as good of a secret keeper as she thought. She had assumed she had hidden it in a great place, but maybe the sock drawer wasn't that good.

"What can I say, babe, I know our home." Ali winked at her, giving her one last kiss before pulling away. "Now, go celebrate with your teammates and sign some autographs." Ali encouraged her. She knew just how much the fans loved their keeper, and she didn't want to deny them a chance to spend a few moments with Ash. 

Ashlyn hesitated not wanting to be away from Ali 's side even for a moment. "I can stay babe." She offered, reluctant to leave even with the fans calling out for her. 

"Go now, greet the fans they've been waiting. You and me? We're gonna be celebrating later, you can count on that. I'll finally finish that cake I promised you." Ali watched as the tip of Ashlyn's ears went pink, and the keeper ran off to finish greeting the fans and celebrating the team wins. 

Ali watched with interest as Ashlyn walked out. She had never planned to fall for Ashlyn but the girl had swept into her life like a hurricane but had brought light and happiness. Ashlyn had taught her the real meaning of home and love, Ashlyn had helped heal the broken pieces and support Ali as she put them back together herself. 

Life before Ashlyn had been a rollercoaster, but at least this time Ali was confident that she could survive anything with Ash as her ride buddy. Because no matter the adventure or the struggle at the end of the day, they could just come back home to each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So first off, I would like to thank each and every one of you who read Finding Home and Keeping Home. These stories have been my babies, like probably the works I am most proud of. So to everybody who left kudos and comments, it means a lot to me. As for long multi-chapter stories in the Find Home universe, I think this is the end. I may write like a one-shot in this universe if I decide to write their wedding, but I don't think so. 
> 
> I think this is where I end and I'll leave the future of their wedding up to you. 
> 
> Special shout-out to one of my best friends Ana (Who is probably more obsessed with soccer than I am). Without whom you probably would not have gotten the smut. That was pretty much all her writing for the smut part, and honestly, she did an amazing job bringing it to the page. 
> 
> The characters and this story, in particular, have been very near and dear to my heart. Like I love the AU and it wouldn't have been anything special without you guys. So seriously thank you to you all, and special shout out to Nethog, Bluenun, for always believing in me. 
> 
> Until the next time, may you always find your way back home. I love you guys and I hope you read my future works
> 
> \- Becks


End file.
